Cold, So Cold

I know. I neglect you.

I ignore you.

I claim to be too busy.

Your cries for help go unnoticed.

I apologize, interenet, for spending such a little amount of time with you.
The truth is, I haven't had much to say to you lately. Do you really want to hear me tell stories about how I and some of the other guys dressed up like the Channel 4 News Team for Halloween, and I walked around saying and doing mildly retarded things all night? (Biting through the Reese's cup with the foil still on it, wasn't so much dumb as it was foul.) Tin foil, not so yummy. Write that down.

Other notes: People who talk on their cell phones while in a public bathroom. STOP. Really, if you drop it in the urinal, you deserve it. One, taking a cell phone anywhere near where it could drop into water, especially when you will need to utilize your hands for something other than talking on the phone is just asking for it. Two, nobody wants to hear about your plans for your night out with the inlaws while they're in there. Third, aren't you basically flagging something you hold up next to your mouth on a daily basis? Christ, that's disgusting.

Also, I've finally started my count down to my trip to Chicago next week. Drinking and luxury will surely abound. We're staying at the Amalfi Hotel, (really, click on the link) which after looking at it, doesnt' even feel right. I have no business staying in a place this nice, as I am, truly, white trash. you know, classy. We still haven't figured out everything that we're doing out there yet, so if anyone has any suggestions of places to go out there, I'm listening, especially if you're paying. Regardless, it's going to be the end of November in Chicago. This may be the coldest I am all year. And I'm totally okay with that.

If you find me in a full tub with a toaster: PLUG IT IN!

Really, a White Sox/Astros World Series? F me with a broken off broom handle.

It's bad enough to be a Cardinals fan and have to suffer last years 4 game uber-embarrassment.
But this? The Astros? You've got to be kidding me.

By the way, that play in the 5th where Everrett obviously missed the tag on Molina? Awful. Not even close. A couple of thoughts on that play.

1) The fat, blind, obviously mentally impaired umpire was out of position to see that play. Why he was inside the diamond, with his back to where the throw was coming from, is beyond me. He has no business there. From that angle he can't 1) See a player coming across the back of the bag. 2) See any tag being made on a runner, who is going to almost always slide to the inside and block his view.
and 3) Get anywhere near making a call that doesn't F the Cards right in the collective balloon-knot and ruin any momentum that they had started to build.

To make matters worse, I had to have a conversation with my father about this play on the phone not long after it happened

Me: Did you see that bulls*** call? That was absolutely effing terrible

Dad: I don't want to hear about it.

Me: But did you watch it??? Awful, that's why they need to have instant replay. That was ridiculous.

My Trapped in the 50s father: These damn games take too long already, that would make it worse. Whatever the umpire says the call is, that's the call.

Me: Good to know that your bedtime is more important than getting right effing call, you're a real godforsaken purist.

My increasingly irritated father: Remember, I don't want to talk about this. Goodbye.

That's the kind of mood I was in last night. Seriously, after thinking that they were back in it, I get kicked in the junk again by a team that barely made the playoffs.

At least I don't have to waste time watching the World Series this year.

Rocky Effing 6?

I just saw this on Yahoo!

I don't know whether to laugh, or cry, or just hate Hollywood for not being able to do anything orignal. Ever.

Rocky 6? I didn't know they had wheelchair boxing.

Annual Heart Attack

I handled last night's 4-1 loss to Houston a lot better than I thought I would have.

And by a lot better I mean I didn't flip over my coffee table, kick my couch, and fire a plastic cup all the way from my living room through my dining room to my kitchen.

Then again, the thought of going back to Houston, tied at 1-1, with the Anti-Christ (Roger Clemens) pitching for them, makes me iron my shirt while I'm still wearing it.

Speaking of baseball, don't even get me started on that BS call from game 2 of the ALCS. The ball was caught, the home plate umpire called him out, and then didn't stand by his call. Even worse, none of the field umpires said a word, instead being content to sit on their fat asses, close their eyes, and let it go. Yes, I know Crede still had to get the hit to drive in the run, but if that play is called correctly, it's a moot point.

In other news, I picked up the new O.A.R. CD (big surprise, I know). But here's the thing. I don't like it that much. It's too reggae, too slow, and too......adult. The songs have meanings, and are thoughtful. I don't like it.

What? I know, I'm 26, something being grown up sounding shouldn't bother me. But in college they were our party, drinking, have fun with your friends band, and I think that once a band takes on that role, they have to stick with it, otherwise, it just goes badly for them. The really disgusting part was looking for it online and finding it under "Adult Alternative" on Best Buy's website.

Also, apparently I can't drink during the week anymore. I feel like balls today. Even a Propel and a ton of water this morning didn't help. Weak.

Okay, so it was a really lame comeback

Thanks Sarah, nice comment on the last post.....

I apologize for the sparseness of my updating over the past few weeks. Between work, school, and the like, I haven't had much in the way of energy for posting lately.
However, last Friday, after the threat of physical violence if I didn't update (Thanks Sarah and Sharda!), I realized that I need to at least attempt to get back on the ball.......

Over the weekend we celebrated birthdays (got drunk), celebrated a flag football win (got drunk) and Megan and I went to the Weezer/Foo Fighters concert (Surprise! Drunk again)

The concert itself was spectacular. We had seats in the first row of our section, just off of the floor, which was nice for two reasons.

1) I'm too damn old to be on the floor of a rock show.
2) Walking from the floor to the beer stand? Way too far.

Weezer itself was especially amazing. For those of you that say Weezer was cool for like 5 minutes in high school and is now only listened to by a bunch of dorks: You're absolutely right. Blow me.

There were several highlights:

- Rivers Cuomo is notorious for not saying a damn thing during the bands concerts. He's pretty damn shy guy, that or he just doesn't like people. Anyways, at one point mid set, he talked for a couple of minutes, basically to say that since Foo Fighters weren't going to play "Big Me" that night, that they were going to do it. But that was damn near all the talking he did.....

-Rivers switching spots with drummer Pat Wilson to do the last song of the main set, Photograph, which they then ran into a cover of Song 2 by Blur. It was pretty sweet.

- The solo acoustic version of Island in the Sun during the encore.

However, of course, there were lowlights:

- They stopped selling beer like 4 songs into the Foo Fighters set. Are you kidding me? It's a concert, let me drink!

- Weezer only played 2 songs off of Pinkerton. And I'm officially a total dork.

- The 40+ year old woman who was wandering around in a sheer shirt with no bra. Lady, you're at a Weezer concert, and you're like my mom's age. Put the feeders away. Really.

Oh yeah, Foo Fighters were pretty damn good as well.

Also, I've moved into official baseball playoff stress mode, starting with the upcoming game Wednesday for the Cards against Houston. 7 Games last year almost gave me a heart attack, I hope they can dispose of Houston more quickly this year.

Don't Call it A Comeback

All LL references aside, I haven't been intentionally neglecting my blog.

Sadly, I've gotten really busy at work over these past few weeks.

And by busy, I mean that my work area is within a direct line of sight of a superior's office. Which tends to limit my blogging and/or internet surfing. Trust me, internets, I aplogize for this transgression against slacking. We all know it's not what I intended.

So, what have I been up to? You mean other than staking out and plotting the severe beating of my dry cleaners?

Ouch, well, here's the sad part. Not much.

Somehow, my employer has managed to find ways to keep me pretty busy with work, which is fine for now, until I get truly overwhelmed. And by overwhelmed, I mean having to fix mistakes made by people with slightly lower IQ's than my toaster.

Accomplished in the last 2 weeks:

1) Went to the Browns home opener, which was fun, except for the losing part, and the sunburn part. This day also kinda sorta lost some semblance of control when Bob and I were walking from one end of the parking lot back towards our cars at about Noon time, when we saw an RV with a sign on the side that sad "Come do a Shot for Martha's Birthday"

Surprisingly, we totally fell for it. We figured, hey, middle of a Sunday morning, middle aged people, what's the worst that can happen.

A shot of Wild Turkey apiece later, we realized what could go wrong. Needless to say, I spent most of the first half being beligirant. But I didn't get arrested, which is a bonus.

2) I have some how ended up training some of the newer people in my department. Being that I have been in this department for all of 3 weeks, I can't say that this was a good call by the powers that be. It's more the equivalent of asking a guy with one leg to run the first leg of a relay race. It'll get done, but all I'm doing is leaving everyone really far behind.

3) Realized that I must be in some semblance of a relationship. Megan and I have been dating for a couple of months now, so that was inevitable, but I realized it when I got in my shower Sunday morning and saw a razor that I didn't recognize. It was blue, and had all kinds of little curves and grippy things on it. (it had a razor blade on it, otherwise I might have thought it was something else) Needless to say, that woke me up a bit. Her leaving a toothbrush there I had adjusted to, that's just practical, but the razor? Whatever. I'll live with it, but if a box of feminine hygiene products shows up in my linen closet anytime soon, I may have to draw the line.

One More Thing That's Wrong With Most People

Let me start this post by stating one very simple, obvious thing. I'm lazy. Like really lazy. And I wouldn't ever be accused as someone who "enjoys working". When the clock hits 5:59 here in my office, I'm locking up my desk and shutting down my computer and doing the Office Space style "watching it save my files at the speed of a fat man in the last half of a marathon, praying that no-one throws anything on my desk"

However, that also has something to do with the fact that I work in an office, not in a service industry. I can get away with shutting it down right at closing time.

Is this going anywhere? Maybe.

Bottom line. My dry cleaner pissed me off the other night.

Now, this is nothing new, as the dry cleaner, (all dry cleaners) annoy me. The concept of dry cleaning is annoying to me anyways, as I don't like having to pay for a process I don't understand, which 30-40% of the time results in my clothing coming back different than when I dropped it off. Losing buttons, shrinkage, etc? This shouldn't happen, but it does happen at more than a couple of the drycleaners I have tried.
You don't go to a car wash and come out with out a tire, do you? So how does the dry cleaner manage these things?

Back to my original point. I walk into the dry cleaner at 8:50 the other night. They close at 9. That means, customers can't go in there after 9 and drop off and pick up. At least that's what it means in my world. I would think that this is what it means to EVERY RATIONAL ADULT IN THE FREE WORLD.
However, to the middle-aged, GED acheiving wretch behind the counter, it apparently meant that she was walking out the door as soon as that clock ticked to 9pm, regardless of whether or not there was still things to do. I don't think she got it.
I say this because she said to me, and I quote "Could you bring your stuff in a little earlier if you're going to be dropping it off from now on? We close in a few minutes"

I wanted to light this girl on fire. Really? No kidding you close in a few minutes, why do you think I showed up now? This is besides the fact that I dropped of 3 shirts and 1 pair of pants.
Not like I just showed up with my whole friggin wardrobe, is it?
I honestly thought about just strangling her with the pants, but then I probably would have stained them, and they would have charged me more.

Weekend Viewing Schedule

I know it's a little late on Friday for something like this, but it occurred to me about 4.3 seconds ago that my friends and I always joke that TV cameras should follow us around, because we are without a doubt some of the most entertaining people we know. And hell, I'd watch us. But we' have to be on HBO or something, or the censors would kick us off after the first forty seconds of the first episode.

I only bring this up because this weekend is going to be some combination of tension and humor, to say the least. Here's how it shapes up.

Friday 6pm- Race for the Cup (Sports) Watch me drive home as fast as humanly possible without getting pulled over, all in the quest to get a much needed cocktail.

Saturday 12 Noon- Road Trip/Meet the Parents (Comedy) Megan and I driving back to PA for a wedding for one of her friends brothers (I think). Surprise! It's in her hometown. Fortunately I only have to meet her mother on this trip, and it's only for lunch. Allegedly low stress. However, between driving two hours to a place called Beaver, PA, and not having ever been on a road trip with her, I'm bound to say something stupid. It's what I do.

Saturday 6pm The Waiting Game (Reality) The wedding reception. I'm imagining that the ceremony won't be a big deal, because that's a quiet time. However, I'm not going to know a soul at the reception, and knowing that Megan hasn't seen her friends from home in weeks, I don't expect her to be there for me to talk to the whole time. That leaves me with her friends boyfriends, whom I'm going to have to pretend I have some interest in listening to them talk about the Steelers for oh, about 2 and a half hours until they get drunk enough to start chanting "Brownsssss Shuuuck" (extra letters added for drunken Pittsburghian slurring) and probably spitting Rolling Rock on me in the process. This will probably happen to the point where I will want to douse them in Jack, and light them on fire.

However, failing that, I will probably just try to swallow a lit candle, and chase it with a steak knife.

(To Megan's credit, she has endured all of my friends, and our inside/offensive jokes, and I intend on being as polite and normal as possible.)

Sunday 4PM Survivor (Reality) Bob and Carrie are having a Labor Day bonanza, featuring liquor left over from the wedding. It will also feature lots of food, cornhole, and something that Bob is calling Donkey Punch. Be afraid, be very afraid. This may lead to some 'situations' that might be better left to the bonus DVD as opposed to the network airing.

Katrina is a Whore

Mother Nature is a bitch, what can I say?

I know I don't normally due thinky, thoughtful posts or anything. However, sometimes I get moved.

I found a blog about the hurricane from two reporters in Gulf Port, MI, who stayed in the city in their news office while the hurricane hit.

Call it crazy, or brave, or stupid, but whatever, it's interesting, and you have to give them credit for sticking it out and doing their jobs. Do yourself a favor though, read it from the beginning (the bottom) up to the top, you'll see a significant change in how they approach it as they see how bad it gets.

And to think we bitch about snowstorms. Pansies.

Someone Should Flood HIS House

On the way home from work yesterday I was listening to the ol' AM radio. (yes, I own a car that was built within the last 10 years, but sometimes I like listening to the AM radio. Fine, give me my Golden Buckeye card, I'm old. Damn kids)

But I digress. On this AM radio show, the host is known in the area for being a little 'acerbic'. And yes, I know that me calling someone acerbic is like OJ saying that someone 'may have' committed a crime. Anyways, since it has been such big, unfortunate news, they were talking about the hurricane. The host said, and I kinda sorta quote "Don't come crying to me, it's your fault if you decide to live down there, or if you decide to stay in your home when they tell you to get out, I'm not going to send them any money" You know, classy. He went on for about another 10 to 15 minutes on this little tirade of his. Whatever.

Here's my thought on the whole thing: Don't ever damn someone for choosing to live someplace. Even Pittsburgh. Or the South. Really, chances are they are there for the same reasons we live in blizzard and crappy weather USA. Because that's where their jobs and their families are. The other thing, and I guess I can see where he's coming from, is, why the hell would you stay in your house if you know it's about get flooded the hell out. What I had heard was that a lot of people knew that if they left, their homes would be looted before the storms came. I mean, at that point, what's the difference? Either some delinquent is walking off with your TV, or the river is. I'd think you'd be covered either way. But I guess to some people there's more dignity in getting smoked by mother nature than getting ripped off by some drop out named Deshawnquantham.

Better yet, who are the dirtbags looting homes right before a hurricane? Anyone caught looting during something like that should be tied to a telephone pole right in the path of the damn thing.

Oh, and back to the radio show host-when we have a blizzard this year and karma sends your SUV sliding into a ditch, don't complain about the stupid weather, b/c you chose this over a hurricane once every five years, idiot.

No, really, it's only Tuesday...

Really, this is kinda funny, but really, leave it to the Brittish to make it out to to be funnier than it is....

I'm extremely tired today, and completely avoiding doing any work at this time. Also, for some reason, I don't have a very good topic to talk about.

One note on the weekend: Relatively tame. I went out and did stuff both nights, but managed to avoid any significant hangovers. That doesn't seem like me. I'm scared. Hold me.

The winery idea that the girls came up with was nice, but I think they may have tossed the "classy low-key" part out the window when Diane played "I Want Your Sex".

That song is neither classy, nor low-key. Nor is it sung by a straight man. So when he's saying "I Want Your Sex", he means another guy. Now I'm just really uncomfortable. Why did I think of that? Damnit.

Sadly, I'm Still Like This

After my post the other day talking about self control (and subsequently, my lack thereof) I started thinking about how long I've been and on-again, off-again (mostly on, I guess) jerk. Now, as I've probably mentioned, or many of you probably know, I played baseball back in HS in Pennsylvania. And, as you may be surprised to know, I sometimes got a little too fired up or a little too competitive. An example just for fun:

The summer after my junior year, I was playing in one of the summer leagues. It was more of a recreational league than a competitive league, mainly because I wanted to play with more of my friends, and because I played in the more competitive leagues in the fall and during the HS season. Of course, some of the other guys from the team and a lot of guys that I went to school with that couldn't make the team played in this league as well. And it was one of those volunteer leagues, so in a lot of cases the parents were the coaches.

During one game, we were playing against a team whose coach I didn't particularly care for. His son was on the HS team with me, but mostly rode the bench and bitched about never getting a chance to play. I don't think he realized that he never got to play because he wasn't really all that good.

Here's what happened: I was on second base with two outs. One of my teamates got a base hit that should have been a double. One problem. He was chubby. And slow. And too dumb to admit either of these things. Anyways, scoring from second on a double or a ball hit into a gap is a piece of cake. So I'm jogging home, and this genius decides he really wants that double, even though he was barely making the turn at first by the time the outfileder had picked up the ball. Mind you, I'm still jogging, and the kid gets nailed at second, for the third out. Now, I figure that I had scored easily, however the umpire diasagreed and waived the run off. I may or may not have argued with him, asking him when his appointment to be IN the Special Olympics was. Somehow THAT didn't get me ejected. I got warned and went upon my merry way.

This is the fun part. I was pitching that game.

So....I get my glove, head out to the mound, and start to warm up for the next inning. I hear the coach from the other team (who's a jackass) Yapping to his team in the dugout that "that's why you don't slack off out there and expect things to be handed to you, like Gordon (me) does." Really, I know this guy, does he think I'm not listening?

That was my "boiling point".

I stood on the mound, put my glove hand to my side, and flipped him off. Not for a second, not ten seconds. I stood there. And yelled "hustle for this, you jackass!" and just held it up there.

THAT got me ejected. The umpire tossed me, so I turned to him, held the finger up and said, "Well let's make it f'ing count then"

My mother was at this game. She could not have been more disappointed in me.

That's why I'm a jerk.

An Open Letter

To: Self Control
From: Gordon

Dear Self Control,

Hey there! I know it's been a while since we've talked, and really, that's probably been my fault as much as anything. I know that over the past few years I've treated you like that friend who isn't really your friend, only spending time with you when there was nothing else to do. You know, only brining you around when the only other alternative was throwing myself down the stairs just to go to the emergency room in order to have something to do.

Now, keep in mind that without you to bring me down I've had some great moments. For example New Years 1999-2005, graduation in 2001, Las Vegas, and any other excuse to celebrate that I can think of. Without you there, I've been free to be myself, act as I wish, and pay the consequences at a later date.

However, as of late I've noticed a change. Suddenly, your abscence has only served to make me an angry, ill-tempered drunk. With out you to stand by me and say "You don't need that whiskey, you've already had 6 beers, two rum and cokes, and a shot of vodka", I've been running rampant. As I near the ripe old age of 27, I seem to be regressing to the level of a 4-year old girl, as Sarah so kindly put it.

This has led me to only one conclusion. I'm here, asking you to come back into my life. Whether I like it or not, I need you there to keep an eye on me, because I have proven that I am simply not what you would call a "resposible adult". Now, this in no way means that I'm looking for an exlusive relationship. There won't be any "don't eat that slice of pizza" or "let's go to the library instead of the bar". Noooo, not no chance, no how. I simply need a system of checks and balances to make sure that I don't ever wake up after a wedding, face down, thankful that I didn't choke on my own vomit, and not remembering how I got there or why I have my room key still clutched in my hand.

This is my plea to you. I hope you decide to accept, otherwise, the next time, I might end up in jail.

Wedding Carousel Pt 89808

Okay, it's not really that many. By this point in the summer it just seems that way.

Wedding # 5 this year takes place this weekend. The highlight of this one is the wedding gift that we purchased the couple, who just happen to be big Browns' fans. And alcoholics. Hence this gift is pretty much perfect. Of course, the combination of the gift, the hotel, and the tux puts me squarely in the poor house once again.....

Then again, considering that we'll be golfing tomorrow with the guys from the wedding party and then some at Ghettowood Country Club, being poor might be the appropriate socio-econimic demographic for me to be in to golf there. Why do we call it Ghettowood? Well, when's the last time you went to a golf course where the sprinklers were rusted to the point they wouldn't turn on, the greens were so dry and hard that the ground was cracked, and they really didn't care if you took cases of beer onto the course with you? Yeah, that's what we're dealing with. Fortunately, there's never anyone else on the course b/c it's so bad, so we essentially get to drink, be belligerant, and generally makes asses of ourselves, which is a specialty of ours of course. I'm sure someone will come up with the brilliant "one beer per hole" idea, and have to be carried off the course. Super

Still in class today, thank god I'm off tomorrow, I don't think I could take a full week of this stuff. Granted, when I mentioned to our class facilitator that I had a vacation day scheduled for tomorrow, I thought she was going to start shooting laser beams out of her eyes right through my junk. Not good times.

The rehearsal dinner is tonight, which promises some semblance of shenanigans.

Also, I really, really need a nap.

I Snatched This From Another Blog

....But it's totally fine. Actually, it's more than fine. That, and I really wanted to use the word "snatch" in a blog title, b/c it will make Sarah and Diane cringe. Or was it moist that makes them look like they just got punched in the collective baby-maker?

Anyways check this out: Christopher Walken is apparently running for President. It could always be a hoax, but the website seems too well done for it to be fake. Plus, there's no mention of him running on a platform of more cowbell......

Oh, and there's a poster too. I think maybe when Bob and Carrie go out of town on their honeymoon, I may wallpaper their room in these just to freak them out......

Thanks to AMG for making this available on her blog, thereby brining it to my attention.

Save Me!

I'm still in a classroom here at work. I'm sure our educator means well, but I'm at the point where the thought of another day of not doing anything but listening to this woman talk is making me want to wash my hands in a bucket of acid.....

Couple of quick thoughts from the weekend:

Both my Eric Metcalf jersey and my Ferris Beuller poster arrived in the mail on Saturday, and they both made me giggle like a small child on a sugar buzz.

Saturday's party was a blast, and entertaning as always. I'm not sure why, but every time Loyd has a party, we manage to plow through a keg of beer in nothing flat. We always say "one keg should be plenty, there won't be that many people here", but then we destroy it playing flip cup. Funny how that works.

Also, you know you've found a keeper when a girl you've been dating for a month does a keg stand, in a skirt, in front of a group of your friends, and lasts longer than some of the guys. Good work Megan, that's an All-Star move.

Finally, if I can find a way to get a nap in at work, that would be spectacular. I'm having one of those George-finding-a-way-to nap-under-his-desk moments from Seinfeld. Really, a blanket and an alarm clock? That's all I need my friend.

Also, will someone please tell Dick Clark that it's okay, he can really stop showing up for New Years Eve, my parents don't stay up late enough to know the difference any more. Really, Dick, we get it, you may be 75, but you're pretty much fucking invincible. Really, I think this guy could survive a nuclear Holocaust and dig himself out just in time to say "We'll be right back on New Year's Rockin Eve 2012"......

Big Empty

Two Words:

Nap. Time.

Really, I don't mind being in class all week again, but after 2 weeks now, it's starting to really drain on my usually abundant energy level. In fact, I'm pretty damn tired. In light of that, and the fact that I'm not nearly as annoyed with work as usual, today's post is just a bunch of random ramblings and thoughts.

Is there a bigger a-hole in the world than Terrell Owens right now? Really, workouts in your driveway? Grow the F up. Great Terrell, we all know you were the first kid in your neighborhood to have a basketball hoop, you douchebag.

It's been a lot of fun to watch the Indians make their way into the wildcard race again, especially considering the fact that most people here (ie Plain Dealer pessimist writers) buried them sometime in late June. I might have to sneak down for a game or two in September if they're still in it. Interested parties sign up below.

In response to Bev, who said that she doesn't understand why boys have an obsession with video games: On my PlayStation2, I can be an NFL quarterback, a Navy Seal, a pilot, or a pro skateboarder. In real life, I'm gaining weight, I hate my job, and I'm relatively unexciting.

Which would you choose?

Also, good luck to Sarah on her diet, hopefully it works out for you, because I can tell that you're committed to it, because you've written about it for two days straight. In your honor, I had a Milky Way for desert today after lunch.

Tag This....

Well, this only took me a week to finally do, but here we go........

10 years ago: I was still in high school (holy christ that was a long time ago), playing a lot of baseball, spending a lot of time at the beach, and generally being one of those screw off, smart ass high school kids that I can't stand now that I'm a cranky old man. Funny how times change

5 years ago: That would have been junior year of college, which would have included numerous debacles of life, including most of the guys turning 21, and pretty much everyone being single. Summarily, this resulted in a lot of adventures with Natty Light and the foosball table

1 year ago: I was cursing my job, cursing my MBA program, waiting to go on vacation at the end of August, and waiting to get my car back from the super terrific hit and run. Fun times

5 snacks I enjoy: Only 5? That's not fair. Fat kid likes snacks.... Junior Mints, Salt and Vinegar Pringles, Reese's Peanut Butter Cups, chocolate covered pretzels, Nutter Butters,

5 bands/artists that I know the lyrics to most of their songs: Dave Matthews Band, o.a.r, Blink 182, Nirvana, Stone Temple Pilots

5 things I'd do with $100,000,000: Move myself and my friends someplace warm. (Really, what good is living down on the coast if I have no one to get drunk with?) Pay off my parents house and give them the funds to move someplace they would like. Purchase St. Louis Cardinals season tickets. Buy myself a little person to serve as my personal assistant, you know, like an Oompa Loompa or something. Finally, open the bar of my dreams, in Vegas, including the longest bar in the world.

5 locations I'd like to run away to: Vegas (obviously), Ireland, Destin, FL, Rome, San Diego (that's German for "a whale's vagina")

5 bad habits I have: Cursing too much, having to short of a temper, being too hard on myself, procrastinating, never being able to sit still

5 things I like doing: playing video games, watching movies, playing sports, drinking, and playing video games while drinking (really, I have problems)

5 thing I will never wear: capri pants (really they make them for guys and they are AWFUL), leather pants, a Speedo, a shiny shirt, a Pittsburgh Steelers anything...

5 TV shows I like: Seinfeld, South Park, Arrested Development, 24, Family Guy (that was way too easy)

5 movies I like: Old School, Wedding Crashers, Ocean's 11, Swingers, Baseketball...(I'm mature, really)

5 people I'd like to meet: shit, people should be lining up to meet me.....how about, Vince Vaughn, Dan Marino, Jennifer Garner (simply so I could ask her wtf she is thinking right now), Bill Murray, Lance Armstrong....

5 biggest joys at the moment: Madden NFL 2006, the fact that it's almost football season, the Cards are in first, my grape Propel water stuff, and the idea that my hangover from PIB is finally gone

5 favorite toys: Again, you want me to narrow this down? Um....Big Wheel, Transformers, remote controlled car, Starting Lineup Figures, and of course, my Matchbox General Lee....

I'm not tagging anyone, b/c anyone I would have tagged has already done this, so..if you are reading this and want to do it yourself...feel free...

Sleepy.....

Apparently, going to the store at midnight to buy a video game isn't a good idea, especially if you have to stay up till 12:45 to complete the transaction.

Being in class these last 2 weeks at work hasn't helped either.

I still have a tagged post that I have to do as well, hopefully I can do that this week.

Oh, and for the record, Madden 2006? Amazing

Drunk-in-Bay

This weekend was kind of a blur.

I say that b/c a lot happened, and I was really really drunk. A lot. Almost all of it.

I went to Put-in-Bay with Sarah, and about 2/3 of the free world.

Let's just say that there was apparently some law going into effect that wine was going to be made illegal by Saturday night, because we drank so much of it during the day that I thought I was going to go blind.

I'm also super-third-world poor after this weekend, thanks to not even knowing where I spent money at PIB, and thanks to a small shopping spree yesterday at Crocker Park. But I got two nice shirts for me, and a few small things for my friends new baby, who I'm going to visit today.

And since I wasn't done spending money, I put in a bid on a sweet Ferris Bueller poster on eBay.

Actually, I saw the poster at Red Robin when M and I went to dinner there last night, and sprinted back to her house to buy it online....