Someone Call Children's Services...NOW....

• Just a quick though I had this morning while I was in the shower (Don't ask)
  
  Can we get a pool going on how long it will take for Children's Services to show up after Britney Spears gives birth? Honestly, there's no way that she or K-Fed are fit to be parents. Allow me to prove this.
  
  Britney has apparently forgotten that she is rich and fabulous, therefore stipulating that she must marry in similar fashion. Unfortunately, she's married down twice now. First, she married some guy that looked like he thought he was still on his high school football team. Then she married Keven Federline, also known as the guy that used to change my oil.
  Seriously, someone should remind her what happens when a famous female celeb marries some guy off the street. Please see J-Lo and Judd, Chris, for more details. This guy is one step away from showing up as a contestant on Elimidate. (By the way, chicken fingers as the entree at the wedding reception? There wasn't a Hooters nearby apparently. What was at the open bar? Kegs of Natty Light and Colonial Club Vodka?)
  
  This is not to mention the fact that she's bound to screw this kid's life up with some horrific "I'm trying to show how cute and unique I am by giving my child a ridiculous name" move. Think about it, didn't Gwenyth Paltrow name her kid Apple or something? What's wrong with these people? However, in an effort to be supportive of Britney, I'd like to reccomend some possible names for her new baby that would fit in this vein of unique, and completely cruel. I've even broken them down into categories......
  
  Random, horribly random:
  
  Poncho
  Strawberry
  Shoebox
  Princess
  Bookmark
  Mango
  Cocktail
  
  Vintage
  
  JT-hey...Federline's gone after the second trimester anyways, might as well name it after the ex.......
  
  Perhaps, if the couple is hurting for money, they could go for a promotional tie-in
  
  Britney Spears Federline the Second, prouldy presented by Pepsi....
  
  I have problems. Lots of them