Two Words
Mondays. Suck.
(To put it more clearly: being hungover on Monday from activities that took place Saturday night-not fun.)
I made a little checklist this morning as I was walking out the door, it looked a little like this:
Cell Phone: Check
Work ID: Check
Lunch: Check
Sunglasses: Lost
Application for a new liver: Check
Dignity: Left at the Holiday Inn in Elyria
Also, Sarah was kind enough to post a few statistics about the evening (thanks, really), but she left a few out.
Number of:
Bottles of Champange emptied on the limo ride: 2
Bottles of Absolut emptied on the limo ride: 1
Times the limo had to stop b/c members of the wedding party had to use the bathroom: 1 (I thought this would be much higher, b/c we were drunk)
Sober members of the wedding party by the time we got to the reception: 0
Times I apologized to Paul's mom for being so drunk: At least 3
Inappropriate comments that I probably made to everyone there: 4,097
People who went to the hotel bar after the reception, b/c really we weren't drunk enough: approx 40
If that gives you any kind of an idea about how ridiculous the whole thing was, good, b/c it was 2x more crazy than I can even make it sound. That being said, I had a blast. Drew and I were laying around on Sunday, and we couldn't really think of anything that was bad. The ceremony was short and relaxed, but nice, the photographer kept us moving during photos so we didn't feel like we were just standing around in the sun melting, our limo driver was fun and accomodating, the hotel staff at the reception was the same, and we had an outstanding group of friends in the wedding party that all got along and had fun together the entire evening. Look at that last statement again, it's key.
This is a memo to every bride out there that is planning a wedding right now. I don't care how much you love your overly dramatic, attention seeking pyscho friends. If you include them in your wedding, there is a good chance they will do something to make others miserable, b/c they will be mad that the attention isn't all on them. You all know what type of person I am talking about. Fortunately, we didn't have anyone even close to that on Saturday, and we had a great time. I still haven't even talked to a lot of people that were there, but I'm totally looking forward to hearing some good stories from that night......
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6 comments:
Holy crap, Gordo, you were an effing rock star. I had a complete blast-obviously. I can't wait to see you so I can do my Gordo impression from Saturday. Good times!!!
Gordo,
God love ya, two cheers for 2 liver transplants and drunken blubbering. I've decided that what happens in Cleveland stays in Cleveland, but um, one thing, you could have told me you had just sent your blessings to the porcelain god, prior to my sticking my tongue down your throat! (Let me just add the disclaimer that I am entirely aware that there may have been some kind of warning that I disregarded seeing as how my blood alcohol level was dancing near 100%.) Alas no hard feelings.... Whoa mama, we're all rock stars, if only we had the salary to match.
Anyone else entertained by the fact that the last comment is by "anonymous?"
Again, in my defense, I'm quite sure they were only dry heaves, b/c I remember those, I remember the tongue thing, but not the puking thing, which, rest assured I would have put away at least 2 pieces of gum immediately following any liquid passing the wrong way through my mouth....as you say though, no hard feelings..it happens...
OK, you and Sarah need to visit SLC so we hang out and drink so much we have to sleep in the bathtub (you can't fall out of the bathtub, but you can fall off the floor).
I know who has your sunglasses....
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