Well, That Figures......

So I'm watching the Cavs get beat (nay: blown the hell out) by Detroit last night, and caught myself thinking "well, it's not that big of a deal, we're already locked into our playoff spot".

Then, Lebron went down.

Hopefully it's not that bad. Right now, they're saying ankle sprain. He's saying it's not that bad. Personally, I don't want to even see him on the floor for more than 10 minutes or so between now and Game 1 of the playoffs.

The thing is, I get the feeling that my reaction was pretty typical of any Cleveland sports fans' response to him getting injured.

It was basically me going "Oh Motherf***er!! Are you serious?!" Then, taking a moment and thinking "Well, that figures"

See? That's the thing. I just accepted it, that no matter how well things seem to be going for a Cleveland sports team, the sports gods refuse to allow us to get to the pinacle.

Now don't get me wrong, these Cavs weren't going to win a title this year. No one who's sane thinks that. But this was supposed to be the year that Lebron breaks through, gets us to the playoffs, and the team would have something to build on.

Now? We're a week-plus from the playoffs, Z is just coming back from a sprained ankle, Lebron just sprained his, and Larry Hughes is just starting to get his legs back, and still probably won't be all the way there when the playoffs roll around.

Again, it figures.

The thing is, it's been that way since here since I was born. Just look at the last 25 years. Jordan over Ehlo, The Drive, The Fumble, That Jose Mesa/Tony Fernandez debacle in the 97 series, and hell, everything that's happened to the Browns since 1999.

And yes, I know this stuff has all been covered before. I'm not coming up with some new, cute angle on it. I'm just saying, suffering is apparently the destiny of a Cleveland sports fan.

It's funny, b/c anywhere else you only hear about the fans of certain teams, not entire cities, being tortured. Like those insufferable, antagonizing Red Sox fans before they won their title.
Oh really, Boston fans? Those 3 Superbowls and 16 Celtics titles weren't enough? F. You.

Nothing Wrong Except......

Apparently, Brittney's kid keeps garnering visits from Child Services......

An excerpt from the story:

Spears' attorney, Martin Singer, said in a statement that the hospital made a report to the Department of Children and Family Services as required by state law.

"DCFS immediately responded and determined there was no problem and no reason to open a formal investigation. They determined that the parents weren't involved in the injury and nothing was improper within the home," he said

Nothing wrong, except for the corn rowed, no talent, chain smoking white boy that claimed to be the father.

Two visits from Child Services before the kid hits the 6 month mark? Nice work, Brit.

Granted, if I was Child Services, I'd have someone sitting outside that house FBI survellience style pretty much all the time. But that's just me.

These guys are starting to make Courtney Love look like a competent parent. Just kidding. She's still completely batshit crazy.

Long Live Jack!

Keifer Sutherland just signed on for another 3 years of 24.

Best. News. Ever.

My Liver is Filing for Divorce---

I'm not sure if it was the half a pitcher of margarita's, the Captain that I drank before we left, or the shot of Jager at the end of the night, but my stomach was beyond angry with me Sunday morning.
Granted, the fact that we started drinking at 2 o'clock on Saturday may have had something to do with that. In my defense though, I had to keep drinking to allow myself to ignore the girl at the bar who kept trying to take out my knees with her crutches in some lame attempt to flirt with me.
(Memo to Steph on this one-if you have to say a girl has "perfect eyebrows" as a way of complimenting her, that's probably a sign that she's not that cute. Sorry)

For entertainment purposes:

If you watched The Office on April Fool's day, you remember the PSA's they had with the actors from the show? The show's website has all of them, plus quite a few more that haven't aired yet. Check them out here.. Hilarious to say the least

Also, don't forget, new 24 tonight! I linked the trailer again. How many more weeks until we get to see Jack kick President Crybaby in the ribs? Or just shoot out his knees. I get the feeling that on the level of good fights, that wouldn't be one of them.

Also, if you're hunting for something fun but chill to listen to at work, check out Gnarls Barkley. They were featured on an ep of Grey's a couple of weeks ago. I'm not sure what the story on this band is, as far as who's actually in it, but I know any time Danger Mouse gets involved, something unique usually comes out of it.

Random Thoughts

At least it's Friday. Too bad it's raining for the Indians home opener. Oh wait, I'm not going, so I guess it's not that big of a deal for me. But I do feel bad for all the people that will be going if it does get rained out. Granted, rain won't close the bars......

Oh, if anyone wants to buy my a present, this would be a nice addition to my tshirt collection.

I'm glad to see the Cardinals are off to a 3-0 start, but I'm not believing anything until October rolls around. They've taunted me for two years now, and I'm not about to fall into that trap again.

Also, on Yahoo! There's a trailer for next week's episode of 24. It certainly looks like Secretary of Defense Heller might be making a reappearance, which would be spectacular.

Warning! 24 Semi-Spoiler

If you haven't watched yet this week, you may want to skip this. I'll try not to give too much away, but I want to offer a theory or two on what's going on......
My general reaction to this weeks' episode? Holy Crap.

The whole Wayne Palmer coming back and helping with the operation? Amazing.

The last scene, when we see who's ultimately behind all of this? Are you serious? Logan? The spineless wonder of a President?

I was discussing this whole thing with Drew last night (you know, since we're moderately obsessed), and we couldn't come up with a good reason for why the President, of all people, would be behind all of this, or how he orchestrated it without anyone finding out. So I started kicking around some theories/premises, whatever you want to call them.

So here's my personal/general theory on the whole thing. Mind you, there's some holes in it that I imagine may or may not be filled in by the writers in the next 2-3 weeks.

Here's my thoughts. First off, I think it started with the plot centered around the Centax gas. Logan is a guy who's supremely worried about public opinion, and how things look to the American people, and how history is going to remember him. Remember, he's not an elected President. He took over after President Keeler was shot down in Air Force One during season 4. He knew there was a prevailing feeling (though not publicly, but within his own administration) that David Palmer held a great deal of the responsibility for getting the country through the last crisis. By manufacturing a crisis, and then dealing with it effectively, he shows his own strength and ability in dealing with a situation such as this. That, or he's fallen into this whole "I'm a patriot" thing that Cummings and Henderson have both been spewing.
How do the other players fit into this though? Well, as we saw last season, Cummings was more than willing to do the Presidents dirty work, as in ordering Jack's murder. I believe now that he committed suicide b/c he knew all along that the President was the man behind this, and killed himself to prevent ever having to give up that information. It was a risk he assumed when he involved himself in this plot.
What about Jack? Well, I have a feeling that we're going to find out down the line that Logan had managed to find out that Jack was still alive. That's very plausible. Once he found this out, the rest became easy. Framing him for Palmer's murder makes everything else a piece of cake. One, it elimiates Palmer, who was about to expose the plot. Two, it eliminates Jack in one way or another. Either he's going to be killed, or imprisioned as a traitor. That alone would eliminate any heat that may have been felt by the Chinese, should they ever find out Jack was still alive. Killing of Jack's friends, well that was just to help draw Jack out of hiding, to aid in the killing or capture for Palmers assasination.

So it's a loose theory, but it makes sense.

Was that....

Chris freaking O'Donnell?

As in-School Ties, the two really bad Batman movies Chris O'Donnell?

Grey's Anatomy, now you're just f'ing with my head. Seriously.

Sharda, drunk, champagne, etc

Yeah, We're at Sharda's, and there's multiple bloggers here. Danielle is singing 80's songs in my ears. I have had wayyyyyyyy to much Captain, and I am definitely definitely the only guy here with 12 girls. That's fine though. Oh, and we're listening to 80s tunes. Lots of them. But as long as Sharda takes her shirt off, we'll be fine. Sarah and Danielle say hello. Oh....you all missed the Kris Kross incident. Drunk blogging+hot chicks+hors= superterificfun. Write that down. PS, Sarah has the worst bruise ever on her face. Don't ask.

The Countdown Begins

Days Until I'm Unemployed: 106 (July 14th)

Well, the official countdown starts today. My department is shutting down, and those of us that don't choose to, or aren't able to, find other opportunities with the company are out.

I'll be unemployed. Out of work. A virtual vagabond.

I have 2 bachelors degrees, and I almost have my masters. I'm reasonably intelligent, talented, and relatively motivated.

And now? I'm screwed.

I don't know what I'm going to do. I don't have a good plan. I've said I can do this, or that, or the other thing, but I don't know for sure what I'm going to do. I'll get a severance, and there's always unemployment, and I'm sure I can find a job if I need to.

But here's the thing: I've spent the better part of the last 4-5 years doing stuff I don't like. I want to do something I enjoy, or at least, find challenging next. However, I'm scared that I won't find something I like, or won't be able to get the job I want.

Today's List

Things Making My Day Better Today

1) My new Jack Johnson bootleg, circa 2001, courtesy of Sharda. It's a really really good disc. It's clear sounding, there's no background noise, and it's got a bunch of Brushfire Fairtales songs on it. Bonus points for the partial covers of Garden Grove (Sublime) and Who Do You Love? (George Thorogood). Good times. I owe you for that one, Sharda

2) A new episode of 24 tonight. Seriously, the show is like my little piece of crack for the week. Of course, watching it also means ordering food from Angelo's, playing Xbox 360, and probably at least a beer or two. And yes, I promise I'm 27, not 19.

3) Diane's b-day party on Saturday was a rockin good time, to say the least. Highlights included Sarah drinking an entire LARGE bottle of Arbor Mist (really, who's 19?), Kareoke Revolution (PS-I. Can't. Sing. At. All) and an ill-fated experiment with chocolate vodka. Good times

Things Not Working Out Today-

1) Work. Or better yet, incompetance. Here's a tip. When you get a big office and a fancy job title, and make more money, people surprisingly expect things. Telling the entire floor of people to call the help desk when we're having a system freeze up isn't a solution. It's passing the buck.

2) Cold- I think I caught Diane's. Thanks. First you toss me under the bus, then you get me sick. Want to shoot out my winshield while your at it?

3) My bracket completely fell apart over the weekend. Thursday night I was in great shape, in very good position to win. By Saturday night, I wouldn't have wiped my backside with that thing. To make this worse, everyone paid me for it on St. Patty's day, and in my stupor, I spent a chunk of the money. Nice work moron.

A Band-aid Covers the Bullethole

Alright, I admit, I stole the title of this entry from an episode of Grey's from about 2 weeks ago.

That's not the point.

I'll go on record with a warning right now. This post won't be funny, or intellectual, or any of the above. This is going to be all thinky and feely and uncomfortable. So a good portion of y'all might stop right about here.

Why did I choose this as a post title? Good question.

She came back. In some kind of karmic, "thanks for making peace with one of your old ex's, now try this one on for size" Megan started contacting me last week. It started innocently. Allegedly. Last Monday, a text message that simply said "hello" that led to exchanging texts for about 2 hours. Then, Tuesday, a morning email about a dream she had that involved a friend of mine. That lead to emailing and texting all day. Wednesday, she called, saying she was tired of sending text messages. Another phone call on Thursday, this time from me in repsonse to a text message. Then Friday, at 2 AM, she calls. We talk, but not about anything important.

The whole time, she says just wants to be friends, allegedly. Here's the thing, she made the efforts on multiple occassions, to be friends??
Didn't seem likely. So last night I called her on it. Asked right up front "How are you going to feel if I tell you about dating other pepole, are you okay with that?" She said no. I said, then you don't want to be friends. I tell her there must be more to it. She says it doesn't matter, that she's moving back to Pittsburgh or something, or far away from Cleveland, as soon as she can secure a position, and knows I'm not leaving Cleveland for anything. Says she hates it here. The rest of the conversation trail is pretty hard to follow, and I'm not sure where we left things. Obviously we're not together, but beyond that I don't know if I'll hear from her or not.

The bottom line? A friendship was a band-aid for a bullethole. It's nice to be able to be civil to each other, and talk, but eventually it's going to go bad and bleed out. Should I have been more patient? Maybe, but the fact is, once she made multiple contacts with me, I assumed that she wanted something.

The truly awful part? 2 months of progressing towards getting past it killed off in a few days. Square f'ing One over here.

Fact is, it's nobody's fault but mine. I never should have convinced myself she wanted anything.

Talking myself into it just opened up the bullet hole.

Why My Birthday was Fun.....I think......Maybe?

Well.

I'm pretty sure that the fog from my hangover is starting to clear just a little bit. Very little.

Let's just say that last night was ridiculous. Check that. Saying that does a disservice to ridiculous.

We started out with drinks, margarits mostly, at Crazy Ritas. There was about 20 people there, and it was a blast. I have to say that I don't think I appreciate some of my friends as much as I should, it was really nice to have everyone there, and celebrate with everyone.

Something really interesting happened though while I was there. So we're sitting up on the little back area, which is kind of elevated a few feet over the rest of the bar. We had pretty much taken it over. I was standing kind of against the wall, just looking around the bar, checking out the crowd. And I see Bethany f'ing Borger.....

Who?

Bethany. Let's try and make this simple. She was like Megan, before Megan existed in my world. In other words, she was someone I was with for a good amount of time, things ended pretty badly, mostly b/c I'm an ass, and needed to grow up, (probably still do, thanks guys, really). Why is this weird? Becuase we broke up all the way back in 2003, before my old roomates got engaged, married, had kids. Before she finished school, before I moved to Lakewood and started grad school.

Literally, it was that long ago, pretty much like a lifetime. And the girl lives at home, 5 minutes away from me, and I hadn't run into her yet. And westside Cleveland ain't that big.

I guess the thing that's wierd about it is that I hadn't given her much of a thought once Megan came along or even for quite some time before that. But until then, I wondered how I would react. I was bitter about the way things ended for a long time. As much for my role in it and the way it went down, and the way I handled it (poorly), as anything.

So when I saw her, it was wierd. But not bad. Just different. It was fine actually. Maybe it was the 3 drinks I had already had, or the fact that I wasn't going to mope on my birthday, or that someone had really crushed me more recently, and you can only really hold a bitterness for one person at a time.

That, or maybe I just realized that she was my friend for over a year before we dated, that until it ended we had a lot of fun together, and that really, she's a genuinely good person with a huge heart, who really meant well pretty much all the time. Hindsight being what it is, I would have left me too. I wasn't a great person to be around back then. I needed to grow up.

So, I did the right thing. I went and said hello. We talked, caught up on each others careers, families, friends of each others that we had grown fond of while we were together. We laughed a little bit, talked about how everyone changes a lot in 4 years, especially at our age, and that was it. She saw people coming up to say happy birthday, wished me one as well, we said it was good to see each other, and that was it. I went over and said good bye to her before we moved on to the next bar, bought her a drink, and told her maybe I'll see her again in another 4 yeras......

And then yesterday, of all things, I was messing around online, and saw her instant messenger account was active. Why I had instant messenger on is beyond me. It logs me in when I turn the computer on and I just leave it up for no reason. So I hit the little buddy info thing, just to see what she had up, and the girl has a blog. Of course. Small world huh?

Playlisting

Just a sampling of what's rocking on my iTunes lately....

Matisyahu-Youth
Arctic Monkeys- I Bet You Look Good on the Dancefloor
White Stripes- The Denial Twist
Franz Ferdinand- The Fallen
Panic! At the Disco- There's a Good Reason These Tables are Numbered Honey, You Just Haven't Figured it out Yet.....
Prince- Black Sweat
The Killers - Indie Rock n' Roll
Jack Johnson - Jungle Gym/Better Together
Teddy Geiger - Try to Hard
Brandi Carlile - Throw it All Away
New Found Glory - The Story So Far
Foo Fighters - Friend of a Friend

I know, none of these songs really fit together. Anybody else finding anything new out there that they like?? I'm always trying to hunt new stuff down.

In Case you Are Bored Today....

Sometimes, through the wonders of the internet, I stumble upon greatness....and I share it with you, out of friendship.

CNN/Money.com apparently has a lot of time on their hands, even though it's tax season. TV Dad's probably salary calculations? Priceless. Tony Danza is really getting the short end of the stick here.

But this link is much better. MC Hammer + New Album + Blog = Speechless.

3 Day Hangovers, The Rise of George, The Fall of Rudy

Let's just say that it's Tuesday morning, and I'm still feeling very beat up from Saturday night. Drinking from 7:30 PM to 3 AM? At 21, this equals fun. At almost 27, this equals fun at the time, then roughly 2-3 days of feeling like holy death. Really, spending all day Sunday feeling like I was punched in the stomach? Bad times.

That being said, the party/fundraiser at the LVT on Saturday was one of the best times I've had in a long time. We had roughly 70 people, killed 2 kegs in about 4 and a half hours, and as far as I know, everyone had a really good time. Granted, as far as I know, I had a good time, but I'm not 100% sure. I am thankful that it worked out as well as it did, I was worried that we'd have a subpar turnout, and that I'd feel like a big jackass for thinking it could work. Fortunately, everyone on our team did a great job of getting a lot of fun, cool people to show, so the hardest thing I had to do all night was walk around with an envelope of money on my arm without losing it, and put wristbands on people's arms without anyone losing too much arm-hair.

Grey's Anatomy

My first mistake in writing about this show is that I go to the writer's blog after every episode, so I take what I already think about the episode, then add it to that, and I feel like I'm not making any points that haven't already been made. However, I will say a couple of things. 1) Having George narrate the episode was really cool, and a great change of pace. We always see everything through Meredith's eyes, and as she gets more pathetic, and more lost in her own despair, it's good to see her through someone else's eyes. 2) I liked how they built the entire episode around karma, seeing people getting what they deserve for their actions, both good and bad. And 3) I know we're 19 episodes into the season, and I'm really mad that it's going to be over soon.

24

Sarah and Sharda are going to kill me for this, significantly, but it's good to see stupid Rudy get his. He was awful! And you guys, if you were watching the show, you'd know what I'm talking about, so you can't defend him anymore. Also, apparently Tony and Kim are coming back next week, which means this thing is really going to escalate.

Home Sweet Home?

I realized that lately all I've been posting about lately is 24 and Grey's Anatomy. This means one of two things:

1) I'm very shallow, and have so little going on in my life that I talk about TV constantly.

2) At least I'm not whining about my break up anymore. (You know, save for that vicious set of lyrics I posted on V-Day, but that was to be expected. Deal.)

Anyway, I had the wierdest dream last night. I dreamt that I was a little kid again back home in Erie, and I was at the butcher shop with my mom. Yes, my mother was old school, we still went to the butcher shop, and she had her own garden. I'm pretty sure my parents were hippies in a former life.

And by a former life, I mean the 70s.

Looking at our furniture from around the time I was born, I'm almost positive of it. Given my love of taking showers, I'm really glad I didn't have to grow up on a commune or something, that would have sucked.

Nevertheless, in my dream I just kept eating. And I remembered that everytime we went to the butcher shop, my mom would give me a piece of baloney out of the stuff she just bought, and buy me one of the black and white iced sugar cookies. The ones that were like the size of my friggin head, but only cost 30 cents? Let's face it, that was like 20 years ago.

Then I woke up and I'm like-baloney? WTF? I haven't had that in like 5 years, and the last time I tasted it, I thought I was going to puke. So why the hell would I have a dream about it? Better yet, why did we ever like that stuff when we were kids? It's like an old shoe mixed with salt.

I guess the point of all this is that it's wierd. If I was like a lot of my friends from high school, I never would have left Erie, which, after visiting there a couple of years ago, is not a good thing. Unfortunately, my hometown is very much on the downside of it's peak, and with the way a lot of blue collar jobs are being outsourced, I don't see that changing anytime during my lifetime.
But when you're a kid, home is home and you don't know any better, you can't imagine packing up and moving, and starting a whole new life. Now, we all contemplate the potential of moving at one point or another to take another job, explore other opportunities, or whatever. And as much as I still sometimes miss the familiarity of my small little hometown, I certainly wouldn't trade where I live for anything. (Okay, minus the snow and the crime)

Grey's, Jack, and F*ing Rudy.....

Jack Bauer Terrorist Kill Count: 10
Helicopters grounded with a handgun: 1 (a f*ing handgun...come on people, that's amazing!)

I know it's been two weeks since I've done a 24 post, but I didn't have much to say about last weeks episode. And I'm lazy. And fat. You get the idea.

However, I have to say things are finally starting to take a turn for the better this season. Granted, I'm pretty sure I hate Sean Astin right now, and will heretofore refer to him as "Rudy", as I refuse to acknowledge his role in Lord of the Rings, and would prefer to mock him in this manner.
I mean really, you're going to put Jack in custody? For saving 800 lives? That makes sense.

Personally, I'm really looking forward to the point where Tony wakes up from his coma, verbally berates Rudy, and possibly pistol whips him. That's what I'm hoping for at least.

As for Grey's, well what can I say other than: Holy crap.

First of all, I just picked up Season 1 on DVD over the weekend, and effectively cut my productivity down to zero as a result.

Secondly, Burke is slowly turning into my favorite character. The way he got away with yelling at Christina, and that ridiculous dancing thing? Amazing x2.

Third, is Meredith retarded? That whole thing at the end of the episode repulsed me. Is it possible to start to dislike the main character of a show?? She's becoming this self-destructive, sad, whiny person.

Also, if I saw you Saturday at Blind Pig and don't remember, well, you can thank the Captain for that. As for me, all I had to thank him for was a hangover.....

Made up Holidays and Things Of that Sort.....

Valentines Day is not a day that I've ever enjoyed. For whatever reason, I've felt it was always just an overhyped, super commercialized excuse to pump money out of people. I mean, you don't even get drunk on it normally, so how much of a holiday can it be.

And yes, that being said, I know some people enjoy it, and take it very seriously. Good for you. I on the other hand will probably be out with the rest of the single folks tonight, enjoying not having to be sappy.

In respect of that fact, and the fact that I'm still maybe a bitter little soul, and because I really like this song, I figured I'd post the lyrics here just for fun.


LYING IS THE MOST FUN A GIRL CAN HAVE WITHOUT TAKING HER CLOTHES OFF (by: Panic! At the Disco)

Well Is it still me that makes you sweat?
am I who you think about in bed?
When the lights are dim and your hands are shaking as you're sliding off your dress?
Well Then think of what you did. And I hope to God he was worth it.
When the lights are dim and your heart is racing as you're fingers touch your skin.
I've got more wit, a better kiss, a hotter touch...a better fuck
than any boy you'll ever meet. Sweetie you had me.
Girl I was it, look past the sweat, a better love deserving of
exchanging body heat in the passenger seat? no no no you know it will always just be..me

Let's get those teen hearts beating. Faster faster!
So testosterone boys and harlequin girls:will you dance to this beat- and hold a lover close?

Now I guess we're back to us, oh cameraman, swing the focus!
In case I lost my train of thought where was it that we last left off ?
lets pick up pick up
Oh now I do recall, we just were getting to the part...
Where the shock sets in, and the stomach acid finds a new way to make you get sick.
Well then think of what you did. and how I hope to god he was worth it
For that I'm very sorry love... and though you may have butchered us...
I sure hope you didn't expect that you'd get all of the attention.
(besides) did you really think I'd let you kill this chorus?

***************************************

That was nice and cathartic.....

Ridiculous----Amazing----Etc....

Grey's Anatomy last night completely blew me away. Sarah already said most of what needs to be said about it, but there were two things she didn't talk about that I thought were truly awesome about last nights episode. Actually more than that, so I'll just type and see what comes out.

My thoughts are always more about the writing than anything, because I like writing (even though I'm an awful writer), and when you've watched enough television, you start to appreciate the really well done stuff. This show totally falls into that category. With sitcomes I don't care so much, as long as it's fun, but for drama, for me to sit frozen in front of the tube for an hour, it better be well written.

First off, I loved the way they brought something simple, and inconsequential completely full circle with the girls in the shower. It was so perfect because when you watched the first part of the episode right after the Super Bowl, you figured that was something just a little gratuitous to hook everyone in for the hour. Then, they brought it all the way around to when Meredith was just completely in shock, and broken, and you see the contrast, especially when you see it through the eyes of George.

Secondly, the way they built a relationship between Burke and Derek. First episode, Burke makes it so clear that he doesn't like Derek, and leaves it so simply. Then, through the course of the episode, they're stuck in this horribly impossible situation together, and if nothing else, gain a certain mutual respect from each other that you can really only get from going through a traumatic event.

Also, I thought it was interesting to see the other side of Bailey, b/c she's pretty much 99% bad-ass. At least, that's how she was always written. So seeing her so weak, giving up like that, and then seeing her snap back was awesome. Especially when she says "O'Malley, stop staring at my va-jay-jay". Priceless.

Let's Vote!

I meant to post this a week ago, but we still have time since the event isn't until Thursday.

Danielle, as you may remember, is putting herself up for auction all 18th century slave-trade style, except with nicer clothes. And drinks. And for chairty. So it's not like that at all.

Anyway, we were joking about a week ago that we should get a bet going on the age of the wonderful philanthropist that's going to wager hard earned bling for the chance to spend an evening with her. We'll make it easy, it's either over or under.

We decided on an age: 44. Oh, and I'll take the over. Game on.

I sorta feel bad even doing this, since Danielle is doing it for a good cause, and is clearly a better person than me. Then again, me putting myself up for auction would just lead to a very disappointed charity.

Wait. I'm over it.

I'm kind of mad at myself today. I left my Jack Johnson/Curious George Soundtrack at home, and I was truly looking forward to listening to the disc at work. I picked it up yesterday at Best Buy (whom I still hate, but they sell stuff cheap, so oh well). And yes, I bought a soundtrack from a "kids movie" But admit, you l.o.v.e.d Curious George when you were a kid, so deal.

Also, I've decided after a few listens that I really like Panic! at the Disco. They're kind of Fallout Boy-ish, which I am enjoying. And yes, I'll be 27 in a few weeks, and I'm still listening to punk-pop music, which means I may or may not need to grow the hell up.
However, I highly reccommend them, especially "Love is the Most Fun A Girl Can Have Without Taking Her Clothes Off"

Oh, and The Office last night? Hilarious. Granted, the Dwight bobblehead doll may or may not give me drunken nightmares this weekend.

That's how slow my week has been, I haven't done crap other than watch TV, clean, and listen to CDs. And my apartment is still a mess, so watching TV won the battle apparently.

I Hearby Renounce my Home State.....

Jack Bauer Official Terrorist Kill Count: 7 (still!?!?! Throw me a bone here Fox, damn)
Jack Bauer Collateral Damage Kill Count: 2 (Security guards? Wrong place, wrong time guys)

I have to say, I wasn't especially impressed with last nights action. Okay, okay, Jack did dive blindly into a room and shoot a guy twice, while diving left, as the guy was running to his right. That's hard to do.
It's also difficult to kill yourself with your belt. Congratulations, Walt.
Still, I keep waiting for them to bring Kim back, just to see how the hell they're going to work her into the storyline.
They need to wake Tony up at some point, also. Seriously, he's going to have to shoot someone, at some point.

As far as Grey's Anatomy goes? I don't know what to say at this point. Meredith's hand is on a bomb. Bailey's husband might die. Burke just told Sheppard he doesn't like him.

My head is literaly going to esplode from all this.....

Also......

F'ing Pittsburgh.

I really, really hate that town, that team, etc.

I would comment about the Super Bowl, but I think I dropped enough F-bombs during the game to cover pretty much the rest of the year. I could sit here and rant and rave about how bad the officiating was. (I mean, really, it was awful) and how it seems that the league had a vested interest in Pittsburgh winning the game. Truthfully, I found a good article on ESPN.com by Michael Smith that says it way better than I can.


On the bright side, the first Duke/Carolina clash of the season is on tonight. I won't be missing that, let me tell you.

More 24......More Jack...Please....

Jack Bauer Official Terrorist Kill Count: 7 (still)
Jack Bauer Amazing Non-Muderous Beatings: 1 (give or take)

All I can say regarding last nights' 24: Wow. That show never ceases to amaze me. The strange part was, at about the 40 minute mark of the hour, Woody was like "dude nothing is happening in this episode". Then Aaron (the secret service head who is now my new favorite fringe character) sneaks Jack in to see the president and Jack subsequently beat the bejesus out of Walt. I really thought Jack was going to cut one of his eyes out. He looked friggin possessed. Amazing. I expect a pretty good sized killing spree by Jack within the next two episodes. Also, Kim should be back anytime now, which I am looking forward too, just too see what stupid stunt she might manage to pull.

Grey's Annatomy: To echo Sarah's sentiment, Izzy has a kid??? WTF? And really, what is a Code Black?
Well, I did a little research, and via ask.com, found that a code black may have something to do with a bomb or arson threat. How that factors into the episode, I don't know, but I wonder if it has something to do with the nursing strike.

I read my last post over again, and I realized that I'm a really depressing person to be around lately. Thanks to everybody that threw a comment up there in some show of support, I do appreciate that.
It's a wierd situation for me to be in, simply because I'm not angry at her, and I've managed to convince myself of the reasons she's not here right now, that I don't even think she fully understands and that she's going to sort them out over the next few months and be back. I'm also convinced that I may be delusional, and in need of some kind of drugs to balance out my brain. So it's one or the other.

Also, three days later, I'm convinced that while margaritas from Crazy Rita's are quite tasty, they are not so much good for the "making me feel sober on Sunday morning" part of my life. However, they were very good, and the crowd in there was also very good, so I think I'd like to go back sometime soon.

Everyone sold on that? Good.

Warning! This Isn't Even Close to Funny

So I kept trying to come up with something at least moderately worth posting today, but couldn't seem to shake of the Debbie Downer mode that I woke up in this morning for anything.

Maybe it's the fact that my furnace contiunes to move between not running, or running continuously, thereby leaving my apartment temperature fluctuating betwee 55 degrees and 70 degrees all night.

Maybe it's the snow. Or the cold I can feel coming on just in time for the weekend.

Maybe it's the fact that I'm desperately in need of a job that stimulates my mind and actually challenges some of the talents that I seem to be wasting as I sit here blogging about nothing whatsoever.

Maybe it's the stupid dream I had last night whereby Megan calls me, tells me that said "guy that she says she wasn't dating but is almost certainly seeing now" is no longer in the picture, that she made a mistake, and wants to fix stuff up. Better yet, it's probably waking up, realizing that if reality is the zip code I live in here in Ohio, then that dream is residing somewhere in a zip code on the moon, providing the moon actually had f'ing zip codes.

Then again, it's probably mostly that I feel sad and pathetic for not being able to just put the whole thing in the past, chalk it up as a learning experience, and get on with things. We ended things over 3 weeks ago, talked once about 2 weeks ago, and haven't had so much of a correspondance since, save for a couple of forwards she sent me a couple days after that conversation.

If anything, shouldn't letting go of the whole damn thing be easy, considering I definitely feel like I was the one who was wronged? Don't get me wrong, I made my mistakes too, but it was her call to bring someone else into the situation, and take things the direction they went. If that's what I believe, then why do I want anything to do with her?

It's like having your favorite team make the playoffs, only to blow it every year. You think this year is the one, that it will be different than all the other seasons that let you down, that the little flaws will be overshadowed by the ways that they are superior in every way, then, when you least expect it, you get completely f'ing blindsided with some kind of monumental let down. And yet, despite feeling cheated, betrayed, and completely screwed over, you keep coming back for more.

Trust me, I don't get it either. Again, I'm pathetic.

I'd Post From Home, but I can't type with Mittens on....

Jack Bauer Official Terrorist Kill Count: 7

Temperature in my apartment this morning 56 degrees.

I have to say I was a little disappointed that there was only one terrorist that bit it last night. But at least Jack stabbed the guy in the neck with a pair of surgical scissors, just to make sure it was one of the more violent kills in the history of 24.

I'd have to say it ranks right up there with the end of Season 2, when Jack grabs a guy from behind, runs up a wall and jumps off of it, snapping his neck.

The funny part is, when the guy who was sent to kill Jack came through security at CTU, Drew and I both said "Yeah, that guy is definitely not killing Jack".

Oh yeah, my furnace, still not fixed. I'm beginging to wonder if my electric bill will end up being higher than my gas bill thanks to the copious use of space heaters.

Also, I just realized my birthday is only 6 weeks away. Hello, old age. Okay, seriously I'll only be 27, but I cna retire anytime now, I get the message, work is lame. Maybe I could just marry a rich girl and live the high life for a few years......

Words Can't Describe The Joy

I don't know what to say. The Buttafuocos and Amy Fisher are going to have a televised reunion.

Please please please please tell me that Jerry Springer will be the host of this glorious event.

I promise that there will be a running diary of this, and it will be ridiculous.

Yes Virginia, there is a Santa Claus, and he has a sick sick sick sense of humor.

This is going straight to the top of "Save Until I Delete" status of my TiVo. Foreva....

And Yet My Apartment Continues to Mock Me.....

Apparently, I should be getting the message that my apartment doesn't want me there anymore.

Yes, you heard that right, it's not my landlord, or my neighbors, or anyone that I'm having a problem with. It's the actual, physical structure trying to evict me. Now, I live in the top half of a double, and like most houses in the area, it's a bit older, but for the most part, all of the appliances are under 7 years old, the windows are newer, and it's in "relatively" good shape.

However, there have been some small....issues in the last few weeks. First, about a month ago, my shower stopped kicking out hot water. Now, this wouldn't be a big deal if I was still with Megan, for I could have just gone to her house and showered. As it was, I was stuck going over to Drew's for about, oh, 4 straight days to shower, which is a mild inconvience for him, and very annoying for me. So my landlord had a plumber come and "fix" it, which lasted all of, oh 2 weeks. Then I got a blast of cold water again one morning last week. Awesome.

Then, last week, I woke up one morning and it was 52 degrees in my apartment. Now, this would be fine if my thermostat wasn't set at 64!!! That's quite a little shock when you first get out of bed, where you've been wrapped in two blankets and buried your head inside a pile of pillows.

Oh wait, so of course, the week my furnace goes out, my landlord is OUT OF TOWN!! Awesome. Hey, at least it wasn't the dead of friggin winter. By the time Thursday night rolled around last week, my thermostat said my house was at 50 degrees, but I think that's only b/c that's as low as the little digital number goes. Thankd god for space heaters.
So my landlord has that fixed, said there was a faulty switch down in the basement. And it was working yesterday, most of the day, while I was gone. Then last night, I get home, and it's a little cold. I play with it a bit, and it kicks on, and is running when I go to bed.

Today, I wake up, and it's IN THE DAMN 50s. Again. Seriously. Couple that with the fact that I have a sore back and legs from flag football this weekend, (Yes middle age, I can hear you quietly making your way up my block, F you.) And this is not good times. I'm stiff enough as it is without having that going on.

Okay, granted the back thing may or may not be related to an unplanned headstand that I did after we failed to convert a fourth down and I was on the ground, and tried to flip over, but didn't, and I'm sure I looked at least mostly ridiculous, but you'll have that. Especially with me.

Counting, Unmotivated, and Small Handed

I must say, there's something about a snow storm that brings out the lazy in me.

Okay, that's not really fair. There's something about daylight that also brings out the lazy in me. And darkness, and television. Alright, F it, I'm generally not the most motivated of people.

Nevertheless, sitting in my office (cubicle), watching it pile up in the parking lot, knowing that my 25 minute drive home is gradually morphing into an hour and a half swerve and bitchfest, isn't great for the work ethic.

Add to that that I feel even more lazy because I've decided to take a(nother) break from school. The truth is, I don't feel as bad about this for a couple of different reasons. First off, with my employer now moving to not pay for school anymore, unless I'm willing to sign a 2 year committment to them post graduation, I'm in a position to pay for it myself or get financial aid. Secondly, I wasn't 100% sure I wanted to finish my MBA, once I got further into the process, and was thinking about switching to the Masters in PR and corporate communications. Third, going through the whole breakup and "what am I going to do with my life" questions that invariably arrise, I felt like the wise thing to do would be to give myself some time to make a better decision.

Also, I noticed that when I logged in, that I was at 150 posts. That's not too bad considering:

1) I started this thing less than a year ago
2) I went a good two to three months without posting more than one time a month (see above referrence to being lazy)
3) I'm generally boring and have little to say.....

Oh, and the small hands thing....you guys will appreciate this....

Our winter football league starts up this weekend. Now, of the three times a year we play football, winter is by far the most brutal. It's cold, you can barely run, the fields are frozen and trashed, and you can barely hang on to the ball. I didn't have this blog last year during winter football, but if I had, you would have heard me bitching up a storm about not being able to throw, mostly due to frozen hands on a frozen football that my hands are barely large enough to grip on a 70 degree day.

Well, I've remedied that. I bought a youth sized football, you know, so I can hold on to it.......

I'll give you a minute to clean up whatever liquid you just spit all over your screen.

Done? Good

Listen, the damn ball is intended to be used by youths from 14-15. Well guess what, I stopped growing (taller and or longer) at 16. Don't worry, I can still get fatter, not that kind of growing. And it's not like I was a big kid to begin with, so when I maxed out at five foot ten with hands roughly the size of an above average 7th grade girl, well you can see where I sometimes have problems gripping the ball. I'm sure the ball will still ice up, slip out of my hands, and I'll still flip out about it, don't worry, I'll come through for you......

The returns of Jack, and other miscellaneous....

Jack Bauer Terrorist Kill Count: 6 (including the guy who's bomb he exploded with his cell phone)

It's official. I have a very sustained man crush on one Jack Bauer. Holy effing crap, I don't want to ruin the 24 season permiere, figuring that there may be some people who haven't seen it, or some people waiting to watch it by way of the TiVo or otherwise. I'm also sure that there are some of you that aren't watching, and refuse to watch, and don't want to get caught up in it. Let me just say, that if you are in that group, Jack will come for you, and you will watch that show. And you will love it.

And you will tell Jack what he needs to know, it's just a question of how much you want it to hurt. (Honestly that may have been my favorite quote. Ever.)

The hard part now is going to be waiting for 7 more days for anything to happen on that show. That's going to require a lot of patience, something that I lack on every possible level.

Other notes from the weekend:

I hate the Steelers. A lot. The fact that they are still in the playoffs makes me want to superglue my hand to a hot iron.

I don't care what anyone says, I never want any part of a shot called "The Circle Jerk" again.

I'm learning, the hard way, that I just flat out can't go out drinking 2 or 3 nights in a row and expect to feel any level of healthy or well rested come the first day of a new work week.

Also, strangely enough, I thought I'd have gotten used to sleeping alone again, but there are nights where it still feels wierd. I still get all the covers to myself, and don't get yelled at for snoring, so I guess it's a trade off.

Thanks to the glory of Sirius, I've discovered Panic! At the Disco....they're worth checking out, but I'm not sure if I even like them enough to be obsessed. I need more convincing

You Know You're Old When......

You find out that Michael J Fox is 44 years old.

This is what I get for reading articles about Boston Legal. I mean seriously, look at the picture, does the man look 44 to you?

There should be some kind of rule that the person who played Marty McFly, AND Alex P Keaton shouldn't be allowed to age past 25. And even that's pushing it.

Don't get me wrong, I'm definitely looking forward to the episodes that he's going to be in, but like he says, the Parkinson's makes it hard for him to work much, which is kind of sad in a way, b/c if you ask me, the fact that they could have a Growing Pains reunion movie, and no Family Ties movie? Garbage.

Damnit Howard.....

I'm truly annoyed right now. Sirius online is apparently unavailable, a phenomena I can only attribute to the fact that Stern is on right now doing his first show, and that the Sirius website doesn't have enough bandwidth to support all the people who are trying to listen. Hell, I could care less if I listen to Howard now or not, I just wanted to listen to some music while I sit here at work.

Also, doesn't it figure that with all the Browns' fans rooting for them, the Bengals lose Carson Palmer, and the game? Sorry Bengals fans, we shouldn't have done that to you....

By the way, I'm rooting for the Bengals......

I almost forgot all about this....

So the Sports Guy is picking the Bengals to beat the Steelers, and he's usually pretty dead on about this kind of thing, especially the playoffs. You can read why he thinks Cincy will win here.

I bring this up for a reason. Somebody asked me the other day "Do you hate the Steelers' more now since M was a huge Steelers' fan and she pretty much killed you?"

I had to think about that for a minute.

See, I'm a Browns fan, so obviously, I've always hated them. When I was dating her, we put a pretty good lid on our hatred for each others teams. Us getting our asses handed to us on a regular basis, well that helped her obviously.

Then I did some thinking about it, and kind of analyzed it, and realized that she really parrallels alot about the Steelers, and their fans....

1) Steelers fans are incredibly smug for a group of people who haven't accomplished anything in 25 years. For example, M was born in August of 1980, 7 months after the Steelers won their last Super Bowl. They've been back since, but played most of that game with their hands wrapped around their own necks. Let's be realistic about this, if they were a baseball team, they'd be the Atlanta Braves, and even they've won a World Series.

2) Most of them possess poor decision making skills. This again reflects the team, and the fans. Really, has anyone ever watched them against a compentant playoff opponent? They spend most of the time looking like they just came out of a coma. Did anyone watch the Ben Roethlisberger meltdown last year? They won their one game in spite of him, and then New England dismantled him. The parallel? M broke up with me for some guy who showed up for their company Christmas party looking like he was dressed for the 9th grade dance. My 9th grade dance. That was 10 years ago, if you're counting, and I swear he stole a shirt out of my closet from that era. That's like saying "Thanks for offering me this nice, clean Nissan Maxima, but the old guy down the street said I could have his rusted out 10 speed, I figure that should work just fine"

3) One word: Overrated. Really, Hines Ward? You're good, you play hard, and you even make some plays. But holding out for T.O or Randy Moss money? Guess what, you aren't even the best receiver in your own division. Let me introduce you to Chad Johnson. Oh, and Braylon will probably be passing you up in about 2 years, barring his health.
Summarily, Steelers fans overrate themselves. Here's a hint, showing up drunk off Iron City Beer, screaming racial slurs, and threatening to sexually assault female Browns fans doesn't make you the best fans in the league. It makes you drunken white trash.

I like gadgets as much as the next guy but....

I think even I could live without this.

Seriously, that's a little to Sci-fi for me. Unless this thing can get me into the liquor store after hours, I don't want to hear about it.

Three-Peat

Actually, I just couldn't come up with a title for this post, primarily b/c I'm, you know, not creative. I figured I should name it something 3 related, since this is the third, THE THIRD! day in a row that I've posted something. I guess angst, and moderate depression, along with a light workload, make for easier blogging.

The thing that drives me nuts is that I was out for 10 days. Ten. And somehow, I have less work to do. Half of the files I was working on just completely disappeared. I'm doing my best to try and stay busy, cross every T, dot every I, if you will, but it's pretty bad. I've played more Sudoku than I can even keep track of, which can't be a good thing.

Fortunately, I have my Sirius and ESPN radio logins, so I have something to listen to while I'm sitting around. Unfortunately Sirius's AltNation is apparently having Chirs Martin's love-child, b/c I hear Coldplay at least once every 7 songs.

Speaking of him, I heard that they were going to name their next baby Plum? What the F? was Watermelon already taken? Oh, right, they're, you know........I'll just leave that one out there for interpretation.......

I have a feeling I'll post again today when something more ridiculous strikes me, since I'm sure I'll have plenty of time.....

Ch-ch-changes......

So I figured, as long as I was going to start doing this on a semi-regular basis again, that it was time to revamp this bitch. You know, put some air in the tires, give it a new paint job, clean it up a little. Besides, they say when you go through a break up, you usually take a step back, make some changes, you know, adjust your life a little.

For now, I'll be dealing strictly with the superficial type stuff, like changing my blog template.

Sadly, I doubt one of those changes will be this blog becomming more interesting. I'd have to start being an interesting person in order for that to happen.

Other superficial changes in the works? TiVo.
Goodbye: The OC
Hello: The Office, and My Name is Earl.

That's better.

Also, I linkified up some new stuff down there around the bottom, so we'll see if those even work or not. Additionally, if I had you linked before, and not now, it's because I forgot to save all my other linked blogs when I changed templates. Again, I'm not smart.

One final thought for the morning. Once you reach adulthood, you know if you have a hard to pronounce last name or not. Stop getting upset when someone makes an honest effort and then butchers it. You sound like a baby.

Really, Can Anyone Kick a Field Goal?

Holy crap you guys, I'm seriously exhausted today. I managed to stay awake for the entire Penn State/Florida State game last night, which may have been a mistake. What the heck was I doing up till 1 AM on a school night? Beats me. Actually, it boils down to a few things. 1) I grew up in PA, so I have a certain affinity for PSU, even though I've lived in Ohio for 8 looong years. 2) It was a really good game, close all the way through, both teams having their chances to land a knockout blow, both bouncing back up off the mat every time they got knocked down. There weren't a lot of points in the second half, but a lot of really good defensive plays. And 3) By the time PSU's kicker missed that kick at the end of regulation, it was already 12:15, I had already invested 4+ hours of my time into that game, and I wasn't about to miss the ending. However, the barrage of missed kicks was killing me. I wasn't expecting 3 friggin OTs, that's all I'm saying.

Also, I just read news that Arrested Development is getting it's 3rd season cut short, and that it's probably not going to be renewed by FOX. That makes sense. It's won like 6 Emmys and a Golden Globe, and isn't written on a third grade level. Jason Bateman (the star) said "Maybe the Bluths just aren't that relateable" Right. Well apparently America can relate to Paris Hilton and Nicole Ritchie enough to watch them whore-dumbing it up on TV for what 3, 4 years now? Thanks a lot FOX, way to drive another good show into the ground. But hey, can't wait for Skating with Celebrities. Morons.

It's Been 30 Days but I've lost 130 Lbs of Disloyalty

Hey kids. No updates for a while, huh? What, no one's reading? Fine, F you guys then.

Let's do the quick and easy things first.

Got Sirius satelitte radio from the birth givers for Christmas. Promptly found a new love. It's called Jim Breuer's radio show on one of the comedy channels. If you don't appreciate Breuer, then you've never been drunk, or listened to AC/DC. Especially together.

I chalked up a solid A- in my latest grad school endeavor, thus maximizing the possibilities that I will keep finding ways to get better grades while doing less work.

As massively overrated as I believe New Years to be, (I already have enough "let's get drunk" holidays, thank you very much.) this year was good. Combine 30 of the closest, 50$ for open bar, Sarah in a sombrero, and "making a new friend" and all in all, not a bad night.

Besides, open bar means never having to say "ohmygodwhatdidIjustdo" after ordering 25 Jeagerbombs.

In referrence to the aforementioned "new friend" Some may be asking what happened to the old friend (M). Weellllllllll funny story about that. Apparently her definition of a committed relationship included the collorary "having a guy I work with that I've known for six weeks stay at my one bedroom house more than once after drinking and not mentioning it/clearing it with you, my boyfriend."

Unfortunately for her, I didn't so much agree to those terms.

She continues to hold to the belief that she didn't cheat on me. If by cheating she means she never "f'ed him on a gaming table"*, then she is telling the truth. She doesn't have a gaming table. She probably never touched him, but still, you gotta draw the line somewhere, and that was just shady. Even worse? Dudes a terrible a dresser. I met the guy once at a Christmas party her company threw, and he showed up in an wrinkled shirt with a button down collar. If that's what she wants, she can have it. I just want my Nintendo back. Seriously. If I ever find out that that guy has even touched my copy of Super Mario 3, I will literally bind them with the controllers and feed them every component of that system. That's the mature way of dealing with it, right?

Sometimes

You just want to drink a bucket of drain cleaner......

Or douse yourself in gasoline and light yourself on fire.....

Or you know, some other euphimism for suicide.....

Sorry, just not a happy camper right now....carry on......

Holy Crap

Wow.

I posted a total of once last month.
I told you guys I was an underacheiver.

It's pathetic that I haven't posted more often, especially considering that I haven't been especially busy at work.
Again, look at the title of this joint, are you surprised that nothings happening with it???? Didn't think so.
The sad part is, I've actually done stuff in the last month. I went to Chicago (maybe I'll put a couple of those pictures up soon) went home for Thanksgiving, and I'm going to a Browns game this weekend (sobriety what?)

On the negative, I have to attend a company Christmas party tomorrow night for the girlfriend, which is essentially 5 hours of waiting to be the DD, sitting around not knowing anyone, and being bored out of my simple, simple mind.

I'll try to post more frequently, now that my semester is winding down, and I've decided I hate the world even more, I should have plenty to talk about.

In light of that, I happened to be reading a story online today about how the Pope is talking about abolishing the concept of limbo. What? Can he do that? I thought that the word of the Lord was intended to be taken seriously. Apparently, when it comes to evolution vs. creation, there's no flexibility, but limbo, well hey, people aren't a fan of it? I guess we can work with it. It's like that South Park where Stan almost gets convinced to write a new book of Scientology, which is all made up, of course.

Of course, they're calling it "describing the fate of innocents in a different way" Are they suddenly going to send them all to Heaven? Someone should let them in on that. That's totally like upgrading to first class from coach.

And why do I care, being that I'm not religious. I don't know. I just thought it was funny.

Also, I've come to realize that I share Sarah's obseession with Grey's Anatomy. I also share other Sarah's obsession with Sudoku. It's kinda like crack

But I still think Lost sucks.

Cold, So Cold

I know. I neglect you.

I ignore you.

I claim to be too busy.

Your cries for help go unnoticed.

I apologize, interenet, for spending such a little amount of time with you.
The truth is, I haven't had much to say to you lately. Do you really want to hear me tell stories about how I and some of the other guys dressed up like the Channel 4 News Team for Halloween, and I walked around saying and doing mildly retarded things all night? (Biting through the Reese's cup with the foil still on it, wasn't so much dumb as it was foul.) Tin foil, not so yummy. Write that down.

Other notes: People who talk on their cell phones while in a public bathroom. STOP. Really, if you drop it in the urinal, you deserve it. One, taking a cell phone anywhere near where it could drop into water, especially when you will need to utilize your hands for something other than talking on the phone is just asking for it. Two, nobody wants to hear about your plans for your night out with the inlaws while they're in there. Third, aren't you basically flagging something you hold up next to your mouth on a daily basis? Christ, that's disgusting.

Also, I've finally started my count down to my trip to Chicago next week. Drinking and luxury will surely abound. We're staying at the Amalfi Hotel, (really, click on the link) which after looking at it, doesnt' even feel right. I have no business staying in a place this nice, as I am, truly, white trash. you know, classy. We still haven't figured out everything that we're doing out there yet, so if anyone has any suggestions of places to go out there, I'm listening, especially if you're paying. Regardless, it's going to be the end of November in Chicago. This may be the coldest I am all year. And I'm totally okay with that.

If you find me in a full tub with a toaster: PLUG IT IN!

Really, a White Sox/Astros World Series? F me with a broken off broom handle.

It's bad enough to be a Cardinals fan and have to suffer last years 4 game uber-embarrassment.
But this? The Astros? You've got to be kidding me.

By the way, that play in the 5th where Everrett obviously missed the tag on Molina? Awful. Not even close. A couple of thoughts on that play.

1) The fat, blind, obviously mentally impaired umpire was out of position to see that play. Why he was inside the diamond, with his back to where the throw was coming from, is beyond me. He has no business there. From that angle he can't 1) See a player coming across the back of the bag. 2) See any tag being made on a runner, who is going to almost always slide to the inside and block his view.
and 3) Get anywhere near making a call that doesn't F the Cards right in the collective balloon-knot and ruin any momentum that they had started to build.

To make matters worse, I had to have a conversation with my father about this play on the phone not long after it happened

Me: Did you see that bulls*** call? That was absolutely effing terrible

Dad: I don't want to hear about it.

Me: But did you watch it??? Awful, that's why they need to have instant replay. That was ridiculous.

My Trapped in the 50s father: These damn games take too long already, that would make it worse. Whatever the umpire says the call is, that's the call.

Me: Good to know that your bedtime is more important than getting right effing call, you're a real godforsaken purist.

My increasingly irritated father: Remember, I don't want to talk about this. Goodbye.

That's the kind of mood I was in last night. Seriously, after thinking that they were back in it, I get kicked in the junk again by a team that barely made the playoffs.

At least I don't have to waste time watching the World Series this year.

Rocky Effing 6?

I just saw this on Yahoo!

I don't know whether to laugh, or cry, or just hate Hollywood for not being able to do anything orignal. Ever.

Rocky 6? I didn't know they had wheelchair boxing.

Annual Heart Attack

I handled last night's 4-1 loss to Houston a lot better than I thought I would have.

And by a lot better I mean I didn't flip over my coffee table, kick my couch, and fire a plastic cup all the way from my living room through my dining room to my kitchen.

Then again, the thought of going back to Houston, tied at 1-1, with the Anti-Christ (Roger Clemens) pitching for them, makes me iron my shirt while I'm still wearing it.

Speaking of baseball, don't even get me started on that BS call from game 2 of the ALCS. The ball was caught, the home plate umpire called him out, and then didn't stand by his call. Even worse, none of the field umpires said a word, instead being content to sit on their fat asses, close their eyes, and let it go. Yes, I know Crede still had to get the hit to drive in the run, but if that play is called correctly, it's a moot point.

In other news, I picked up the new O.A.R. CD (big surprise, I know). But here's the thing. I don't like it that much. It's too reggae, too slow, and too......adult. The songs have meanings, and are thoughtful. I don't like it.

What? I know, I'm 26, something being grown up sounding shouldn't bother me. But in college they were our party, drinking, have fun with your friends band, and I think that once a band takes on that role, they have to stick with it, otherwise, it just goes badly for them. The really disgusting part was looking for it online and finding it under "Adult Alternative" on Best Buy's website.

Also, apparently I can't drink during the week anymore. I feel like balls today. Even a Propel and a ton of water this morning didn't help. Weak.

Okay, so it was a really lame comeback

Thanks Sarah, nice comment on the last post.....

I apologize for the sparseness of my updating over the past few weeks. Between work, school, and the like, I haven't had much in the way of energy for posting lately.
However, last Friday, after the threat of physical violence if I didn't update (Thanks Sarah and Sharda!), I realized that I need to at least attempt to get back on the ball.......

Over the weekend we celebrated birthdays (got drunk), celebrated a flag football win (got drunk) and Megan and I went to the Weezer/Foo Fighters concert (Surprise! Drunk again)

The concert itself was spectacular. We had seats in the first row of our section, just off of the floor, which was nice for two reasons.

1) I'm too damn old to be on the floor of a rock show.
2) Walking from the floor to the beer stand? Way too far.

Weezer itself was especially amazing. For those of you that say Weezer was cool for like 5 minutes in high school and is now only listened to by a bunch of dorks: You're absolutely right. Blow me.

There were several highlights:

- Rivers Cuomo is notorious for not saying a damn thing during the bands concerts. He's pretty damn shy guy, that or he just doesn't like people. Anyways, at one point mid set, he talked for a couple of minutes, basically to say that since Foo Fighters weren't going to play "Big Me" that night, that they were going to do it. But that was damn near all the talking he did.....

-Rivers switching spots with drummer Pat Wilson to do the last song of the main set, Photograph, which they then ran into a cover of Song 2 by Blur. It was pretty sweet.

- The solo acoustic version of Island in the Sun during the encore.

However, of course, there were lowlights:

- They stopped selling beer like 4 songs into the Foo Fighters set. Are you kidding me? It's a concert, let me drink!

- Weezer only played 2 songs off of Pinkerton. And I'm officially a total dork.

- The 40+ year old woman who was wandering around in a sheer shirt with no bra. Lady, you're at a Weezer concert, and you're like my mom's age. Put the feeders away. Really.

Oh yeah, Foo Fighters were pretty damn good as well.

Also, I've moved into official baseball playoff stress mode, starting with the upcoming game Wednesday for the Cards against Houston. 7 Games last year almost gave me a heart attack, I hope they can dispose of Houston more quickly this year.

Don't Call it A Comeback

All LL references aside, I haven't been intentionally neglecting my blog.

Sadly, I've gotten really busy at work over these past few weeks.

And by busy, I mean that my work area is within a direct line of sight of a superior's office. Which tends to limit my blogging and/or internet surfing. Trust me, internets, I aplogize for this transgression against slacking. We all know it's not what I intended.

So, what have I been up to? You mean other than staking out and plotting the severe beating of my dry cleaners?

Ouch, well, here's the sad part. Not much.

Somehow, my employer has managed to find ways to keep me pretty busy with work, which is fine for now, until I get truly overwhelmed. And by overwhelmed, I mean having to fix mistakes made by people with slightly lower IQ's than my toaster.

Accomplished in the last 2 weeks:

1) Went to the Browns home opener, which was fun, except for the losing part, and the sunburn part. This day also kinda sorta lost some semblance of control when Bob and I were walking from one end of the parking lot back towards our cars at about Noon time, when we saw an RV with a sign on the side that sad "Come do a Shot for Martha's Birthday"

Surprisingly, we totally fell for it. We figured, hey, middle of a Sunday morning, middle aged people, what's the worst that can happen.

A shot of Wild Turkey apiece later, we realized what could go wrong. Needless to say, I spent most of the first half being beligirant. But I didn't get arrested, which is a bonus.

2) I have some how ended up training some of the newer people in my department. Being that I have been in this department for all of 3 weeks, I can't say that this was a good call by the powers that be. It's more the equivalent of asking a guy with one leg to run the first leg of a relay race. It'll get done, but all I'm doing is leaving everyone really far behind.

3) Realized that I must be in some semblance of a relationship. Megan and I have been dating for a couple of months now, so that was inevitable, but I realized it when I got in my shower Sunday morning and saw a razor that I didn't recognize. It was blue, and had all kinds of little curves and grippy things on it. (it had a razor blade on it, otherwise I might have thought it was something else) Needless to say, that woke me up a bit. Her leaving a toothbrush there I had adjusted to, that's just practical, but the razor? Whatever. I'll live with it, but if a box of feminine hygiene products shows up in my linen closet anytime soon, I may have to draw the line.

One More Thing That's Wrong With Most People

Let me start this post by stating one very simple, obvious thing. I'm lazy. Like really lazy. And I wouldn't ever be accused as someone who "enjoys working". When the clock hits 5:59 here in my office, I'm locking up my desk and shutting down my computer and doing the Office Space style "watching it save my files at the speed of a fat man in the last half of a marathon, praying that no-one throws anything on my desk"

However, that also has something to do with the fact that I work in an office, not in a service industry. I can get away with shutting it down right at closing time.

Is this going anywhere? Maybe.

Bottom line. My dry cleaner pissed me off the other night.

Now, this is nothing new, as the dry cleaner, (all dry cleaners) annoy me. The concept of dry cleaning is annoying to me anyways, as I don't like having to pay for a process I don't understand, which 30-40% of the time results in my clothing coming back different than when I dropped it off. Losing buttons, shrinkage, etc? This shouldn't happen, but it does happen at more than a couple of the drycleaners I have tried.
You don't go to a car wash and come out with out a tire, do you? So how does the dry cleaner manage these things?

Back to my original point. I walk into the dry cleaner at 8:50 the other night. They close at 9. That means, customers can't go in there after 9 and drop off and pick up. At least that's what it means in my world. I would think that this is what it means to EVERY RATIONAL ADULT IN THE FREE WORLD.
However, to the middle-aged, GED acheiving wretch behind the counter, it apparently meant that she was walking out the door as soon as that clock ticked to 9pm, regardless of whether or not there was still things to do. I don't think she got it.
I say this because she said to me, and I quote "Could you bring your stuff in a little earlier if you're going to be dropping it off from now on? We close in a few minutes"

I wanted to light this girl on fire. Really? No kidding you close in a few minutes, why do you think I showed up now? This is besides the fact that I dropped of 3 shirts and 1 pair of pants.
Not like I just showed up with my whole friggin wardrobe, is it?
I honestly thought about just strangling her with the pants, but then I probably would have stained them, and they would have charged me more.

Weekend Viewing Schedule

I know it's a little late on Friday for something like this, but it occurred to me about 4.3 seconds ago that my friends and I always joke that TV cameras should follow us around, because we are without a doubt some of the most entertaining people we know. And hell, I'd watch us. But we' have to be on HBO or something, or the censors would kick us off after the first forty seconds of the first episode.

I only bring this up because this weekend is going to be some combination of tension and humor, to say the least. Here's how it shapes up.

Friday 6pm- Race for the Cup (Sports) Watch me drive home as fast as humanly possible without getting pulled over, all in the quest to get a much needed cocktail.

Saturday 12 Noon- Road Trip/Meet the Parents (Comedy) Megan and I driving back to PA for a wedding for one of her friends brothers (I think). Surprise! It's in her hometown. Fortunately I only have to meet her mother on this trip, and it's only for lunch. Allegedly low stress. However, between driving two hours to a place called Beaver, PA, and not having ever been on a road trip with her, I'm bound to say something stupid. It's what I do.

Saturday 6pm The Waiting Game (Reality) The wedding reception. I'm imagining that the ceremony won't be a big deal, because that's a quiet time. However, I'm not going to know a soul at the reception, and knowing that Megan hasn't seen her friends from home in weeks, I don't expect her to be there for me to talk to the whole time. That leaves me with her friends boyfriends, whom I'm going to have to pretend I have some interest in listening to them talk about the Steelers for oh, about 2 and a half hours until they get drunk enough to start chanting "Brownsssss Shuuuck" (extra letters added for drunken Pittsburghian slurring) and probably spitting Rolling Rock on me in the process. This will probably happen to the point where I will want to douse them in Jack, and light them on fire.

However, failing that, I will probably just try to swallow a lit candle, and chase it with a steak knife.

(To Megan's credit, she has endured all of my friends, and our inside/offensive jokes, and I intend on being as polite and normal as possible.)

Sunday 4PM Survivor (Reality) Bob and Carrie are having a Labor Day bonanza, featuring liquor left over from the wedding. It will also feature lots of food, cornhole, and something that Bob is calling Donkey Punch. Be afraid, be very afraid. This may lead to some 'situations' that might be better left to the bonus DVD as opposed to the network airing.

Katrina is a Whore

Mother Nature is a bitch, what can I say?

I know I don't normally due thinky, thoughtful posts or anything. However, sometimes I get moved.

I found a blog about the hurricane from two reporters in Gulf Port, MI, who stayed in the city in their news office while the hurricane hit.

Call it crazy, or brave, or stupid, but whatever, it's interesting, and you have to give them credit for sticking it out and doing their jobs. Do yourself a favor though, read it from the beginning (the bottom) up to the top, you'll see a significant change in how they approach it as they see how bad it gets.

And to think we bitch about snowstorms. Pansies.

Someone Should Flood HIS House

On the way home from work yesterday I was listening to the ol' AM radio. (yes, I own a car that was built within the last 10 years, but sometimes I like listening to the AM radio. Fine, give me my Golden Buckeye card, I'm old. Damn kids)

But I digress. On this AM radio show, the host is known in the area for being a little 'acerbic'. And yes, I know that me calling someone acerbic is like OJ saying that someone 'may have' committed a crime. Anyways, since it has been such big, unfortunate news, they were talking about the hurricane. The host said, and I kinda sorta quote "Don't come crying to me, it's your fault if you decide to live down there, or if you decide to stay in your home when they tell you to get out, I'm not going to send them any money" You know, classy. He went on for about another 10 to 15 minutes on this little tirade of his. Whatever.

Here's my thought on the whole thing: Don't ever damn someone for choosing to live someplace. Even Pittsburgh. Or the South. Really, chances are they are there for the same reasons we live in blizzard and crappy weather USA. Because that's where their jobs and their families are. The other thing, and I guess I can see where he's coming from, is, why the hell would you stay in your house if you know it's about get flooded the hell out. What I had heard was that a lot of people knew that if they left, their homes would be looted before the storms came. I mean, at that point, what's the difference? Either some delinquent is walking off with your TV, or the river is. I'd think you'd be covered either way. But I guess to some people there's more dignity in getting smoked by mother nature than getting ripped off by some drop out named Deshawnquantham.

Better yet, who are the dirtbags looting homes right before a hurricane? Anyone caught looting during something like that should be tied to a telephone pole right in the path of the damn thing.

Oh, and back to the radio show host-when we have a blizzard this year and karma sends your SUV sliding into a ditch, don't complain about the stupid weather, b/c you chose this over a hurricane once every five years, idiot.

No, really, it's only Tuesday...

Really, this is kinda funny, but really, leave it to the Brittish to make it out to to be funnier than it is....

I'm extremely tired today, and completely avoiding doing any work at this time. Also, for some reason, I don't have a very good topic to talk about.

One note on the weekend: Relatively tame. I went out and did stuff both nights, but managed to avoid any significant hangovers. That doesn't seem like me. I'm scared. Hold me.

The winery idea that the girls came up with was nice, but I think they may have tossed the "classy low-key" part out the window when Diane played "I Want Your Sex".

That song is neither classy, nor low-key. Nor is it sung by a straight man. So when he's saying "I Want Your Sex", he means another guy. Now I'm just really uncomfortable. Why did I think of that? Damnit.

Sadly, I'm Still Like This

After my post the other day talking about self control (and subsequently, my lack thereof) I started thinking about how long I've been and on-again, off-again (mostly on, I guess) jerk. Now, as I've probably mentioned, or many of you probably know, I played baseball back in HS in Pennsylvania. And, as you may be surprised to know, I sometimes got a little too fired up or a little too competitive. An example just for fun:

The summer after my junior year, I was playing in one of the summer leagues. It was more of a recreational league than a competitive league, mainly because I wanted to play with more of my friends, and because I played in the more competitive leagues in the fall and during the HS season. Of course, some of the other guys from the team and a lot of guys that I went to school with that couldn't make the team played in this league as well. And it was one of those volunteer leagues, so in a lot of cases the parents were the coaches.

During one game, we were playing against a team whose coach I didn't particularly care for. His son was on the HS team with me, but mostly rode the bench and bitched about never getting a chance to play. I don't think he realized that he never got to play because he wasn't really all that good.

Here's what happened: I was on second base with two outs. One of my teamates got a base hit that should have been a double. One problem. He was chubby. And slow. And too dumb to admit either of these things. Anyways, scoring from second on a double or a ball hit into a gap is a piece of cake. So I'm jogging home, and this genius decides he really wants that double, even though he was barely making the turn at first by the time the outfileder had picked up the ball. Mind you, I'm still jogging, and the kid gets nailed at second, for the third out. Now, I figure that I had scored easily, however the umpire diasagreed and waived the run off. I may or may not have argued with him, asking him when his appointment to be IN the Special Olympics was. Somehow THAT didn't get me ejected. I got warned and went upon my merry way.

This is the fun part. I was pitching that game.

So....I get my glove, head out to the mound, and start to warm up for the next inning. I hear the coach from the other team (who's a jackass) Yapping to his team in the dugout that "that's why you don't slack off out there and expect things to be handed to you, like Gordon (me) does." Really, I know this guy, does he think I'm not listening?

That was my "boiling point".

I stood on the mound, put my glove hand to my side, and flipped him off. Not for a second, not ten seconds. I stood there. And yelled "hustle for this, you jackass!" and just held it up there.

THAT got me ejected. The umpire tossed me, so I turned to him, held the finger up and said, "Well let's make it f'ing count then"

My mother was at this game. She could not have been more disappointed in me.

That's why I'm a jerk.

An Open Letter

To: Self Control
From: Gordon

Dear Self Control,

Hey there! I know it's been a while since we've talked, and really, that's probably been my fault as much as anything. I know that over the past few years I've treated you like that friend who isn't really your friend, only spending time with you when there was nothing else to do. You know, only brining you around when the only other alternative was throwing myself down the stairs just to go to the emergency room in order to have something to do.

Now, keep in mind that without you to bring me down I've had some great moments. For example New Years 1999-2005, graduation in 2001, Las Vegas, and any other excuse to celebrate that I can think of. Without you there, I've been free to be myself, act as I wish, and pay the consequences at a later date.

However, as of late I've noticed a change. Suddenly, your abscence has only served to make me an angry, ill-tempered drunk. With out you to stand by me and say "You don't need that whiskey, you've already had 6 beers, two rum and cokes, and a shot of vodka", I've been running rampant. As I near the ripe old age of 27, I seem to be regressing to the level of a 4-year old girl, as Sarah so kindly put it.

This has led me to only one conclusion. I'm here, asking you to come back into my life. Whether I like it or not, I need you there to keep an eye on me, because I have proven that I am simply not what you would call a "resposible adult". Now, this in no way means that I'm looking for an exlusive relationship. There won't be any "don't eat that slice of pizza" or "let's go to the library instead of the bar". Noooo, not no chance, no how. I simply need a system of checks and balances to make sure that I don't ever wake up after a wedding, face down, thankful that I didn't choke on my own vomit, and not remembering how I got there or why I have my room key still clutched in my hand.

This is my plea to you. I hope you decide to accept, otherwise, the next time, I might end up in jail.

Wedding Carousel Pt 89808

Okay, it's not really that many. By this point in the summer it just seems that way.

Wedding # 5 this year takes place this weekend. The highlight of this one is the wedding gift that we purchased the couple, who just happen to be big Browns' fans. And alcoholics. Hence this gift is pretty much perfect. Of course, the combination of the gift, the hotel, and the tux puts me squarely in the poor house once again.....

Then again, considering that we'll be golfing tomorrow with the guys from the wedding party and then some at Ghettowood Country Club, being poor might be the appropriate socio-econimic demographic for me to be in to golf there. Why do we call it Ghettowood? Well, when's the last time you went to a golf course where the sprinklers were rusted to the point they wouldn't turn on, the greens were so dry and hard that the ground was cracked, and they really didn't care if you took cases of beer onto the course with you? Yeah, that's what we're dealing with. Fortunately, there's never anyone else on the course b/c it's so bad, so we essentially get to drink, be belligerant, and generally makes asses of ourselves, which is a specialty of ours of course. I'm sure someone will come up with the brilliant "one beer per hole" idea, and have to be carried off the course. Super

Still in class today, thank god I'm off tomorrow, I don't think I could take a full week of this stuff. Granted, when I mentioned to our class facilitator that I had a vacation day scheduled for tomorrow, I thought she was going to start shooting laser beams out of her eyes right through my junk. Not good times.

The rehearsal dinner is tonight, which promises some semblance of shenanigans.

Also, I really, really need a nap.

I Snatched This From Another Blog

....But it's totally fine. Actually, it's more than fine. That, and I really wanted to use the word "snatch" in a blog title, b/c it will make Sarah and Diane cringe. Or was it moist that makes them look like they just got punched in the collective baby-maker?

Anyways check this out: Christopher Walken is apparently running for President. It could always be a hoax, but the website seems too well done for it to be fake. Plus, there's no mention of him running on a platform of more cowbell......

Oh, and there's a poster too. I think maybe when Bob and Carrie go out of town on their honeymoon, I may wallpaper their room in these just to freak them out......

Thanks to AMG for making this available on her blog, thereby brining it to my attention.

Save Me!

I'm still in a classroom here at work. I'm sure our educator means well, but I'm at the point where the thought of another day of not doing anything but listening to this woman talk is making me want to wash my hands in a bucket of acid.....

Couple of quick thoughts from the weekend:

Both my Eric Metcalf jersey and my Ferris Beuller poster arrived in the mail on Saturday, and they both made me giggle like a small child on a sugar buzz.

Saturday's party was a blast, and entertaning as always. I'm not sure why, but every time Loyd has a party, we manage to plow through a keg of beer in nothing flat. We always say "one keg should be plenty, there won't be that many people here", but then we destroy it playing flip cup. Funny how that works.

Also, you know you've found a keeper when a girl you've been dating for a month does a keg stand, in a skirt, in front of a group of your friends, and lasts longer than some of the guys. Good work Megan, that's an All-Star move.

Finally, if I can find a way to get a nap in at work, that would be spectacular. I'm having one of those George-finding-a-way-to nap-under-his-desk moments from Seinfeld. Really, a blanket and an alarm clock? That's all I need my friend.

Also, will someone please tell Dick Clark that it's okay, he can really stop showing up for New Years Eve, my parents don't stay up late enough to know the difference any more. Really, Dick, we get it, you may be 75, but you're pretty much fucking invincible. Really, I think this guy could survive a nuclear Holocaust and dig himself out just in time to say "We'll be right back on New Year's Rockin Eve 2012"......

Big Empty

Two Words:

Nap. Time.

Really, I don't mind being in class all week again, but after 2 weeks now, it's starting to really drain on my usually abundant energy level. In fact, I'm pretty damn tired. In light of that, and the fact that I'm not nearly as annoyed with work as usual, today's post is just a bunch of random ramblings and thoughts.

Is there a bigger a-hole in the world than Terrell Owens right now? Really, workouts in your driveway? Grow the F up. Great Terrell, we all know you were the first kid in your neighborhood to have a basketball hoop, you douchebag.

It's been a lot of fun to watch the Indians make their way into the wildcard race again, especially considering the fact that most people here (ie Plain Dealer pessimist writers) buried them sometime in late June. I might have to sneak down for a game or two in September if they're still in it. Interested parties sign up below.

In response to Bev, who said that she doesn't understand why boys have an obsession with video games: On my PlayStation2, I can be an NFL quarterback, a Navy Seal, a pilot, or a pro skateboarder. In real life, I'm gaining weight, I hate my job, and I'm relatively unexciting.

Which would you choose?

Also, good luck to Sarah on her diet, hopefully it works out for you, because I can tell that you're committed to it, because you've written about it for two days straight. In your honor, I had a Milky Way for desert today after lunch.

Tag This....

Well, this only took me a week to finally do, but here we go........

10 years ago: I was still in high school (holy christ that was a long time ago), playing a lot of baseball, spending a lot of time at the beach, and generally being one of those screw off, smart ass high school kids that I can't stand now that I'm a cranky old man. Funny how times change

5 years ago: That would have been junior year of college, which would have included numerous debacles of life, including most of the guys turning 21, and pretty much everyone being single. Summarily, this resulted in a lot of adventures with Natty Light and the foosball table

1 year ago: I was cursing my job, cursing my MBA program, waiting to go on vacation at the end of August, and waiting to get my car back from the super terrific hit and run. Fun times

5 snacks I enjoy: Only 5? That's not fair. Fat kid likes snacks.... Junior Mints, Salt and Vinegar Pringles, Reese's Peanut Butter Cups, chocolate covered pretzels, Nutter Butters,

5 bands/artists that I know the lyrics to most of their songs: Dave Matthews Band, o.a.r, Blink 182, Nirvana, Stone Temple Pilots

5 things I'd do with $100,000,000: Move myself and my friends someplace warm. (Really, what good is living down on the coast if I have no one to get drunk with?) Pay off my parents house and give them the funds to move someplace they would like. Purchase St. Louis Cardinals season tickets. Buy myself a little person to serve as my personal assistant, you know, like an Oompa Loompa or something. Finally, open the bar of my dreams, in Vegas, including the longest bar in the world.

5 locations I'd like to run away to: Vegas (obviously), Ireland, Destin, FL, Rome, San Diego (that's German for "a whale's vagina")

5 bad habits I have: Cursing too much, having to short of a temper, being too hard on myself, procrastinating, never being able to sit still

5 things I like doing: playing video games, watching movies, playing sports, drinking, and playing video games while drinking (really, I have problems)

5 thing I will never wear: capri pants (really they make them for guys and they are AWFUL), leather pants, a Speedo, a shiny shirt, a Pittsburgh Steelers anything...

5 TV shows I like: Seinfeld, South Park, Arrested Development, 24, Family Guy (that was way too easy)

5 movies I like: Old School, Wedding Crashers, Ocean's 11, Swingers, Baseketball...(I'm mature, really)

5 people I'd like to meet: shit, people should be lining up to meet me.....how about, Vince Vaughn, Dan Marino, Jennifer Garner (simply so I could ask her wtf she is thinking right now), Bill Murray, Lance Armstrong....

5 biggest joys at the moment: Madden NFL 2006, the fact that it's almost football season, the Cards are in first, my grape Propel water stuff, and the idea that my hangover from PIB is finally gone

5 favorite toys: Again, you want me to narrow this down? Um....Big Wheel, Transformers, remote controlled car, Starting Lineup Figures, and of course, my Matchbox General Lee....

I'm not tagging anyone, b/c anyone I would have tagged has already done this, so..if you are reading this and want to do it yourself...feel free...

Sleepy.....

Apparently, going to the store at midnight to buy a video game isn't a good idea, especially if you have to stay up till 12:45 to complete the transaction.

Being in class these last 2 weeks at work hasn't helped either.

I still have a tagged post that I have to do as well, hopefully I can do that this week.

Oh, and for the record, Madden 2006? Amazing

Drunk-in-Bay

This weekend was kind of a blur.

I say that b/c a lot happened, and I was really really drunk. A lot. Almost all of it.

I went to Put-in-Bay with Sarah, and about 2/3 of the free world.

Let's just say that there was apparently some law going into effect that wine was going to be made illegal by Saturday night, because we drank so much of it during the day that I thought I was going to go blind.

I'm also super-third-world poor after this weekend, thanks to not even knowing where I spent money at PIB, and thanks to a small shopping spree yesterday at Crocker Park. But I got two nice shirts for me, and a few small things for my friends new baby, who I'm going to visit today.

And since I wasn't done spending money, I put in a bid on a sweet Ferris Bueller poster on eBay.

Actually, I saw the poster at Red Robin when M and I went to dinner there last night, and sprinted back to her house to buy it online....

Blacked Out

Surprisingly, this title isn't about drinking.

Just for the record, losing your power twice in one week at night, during August, during the hotest week, sucks major balls.

This just in, sweating through your sheets, not hot....